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The Swirl World

Celebrating and Elevating Black Women - mind, body, soul and spirit!


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Mondays (And Dates) With Mike

December 2, 2013 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 6 Comments

big camera hides mans faceLast Monday we enjoyed a veritable feast for the eyes with the “Men From Down Under” – Australian men who make our hearts skip a beat and send us ladies on mental trips to Fantasy Island.

We introduced you to our own Michael Miocevich (pronounced My-oh-see-vitch). Mike lives in Western Australia and cheerfully agreed to serve as our guide to Swirling in Australia.

(He also agreed to give us a first-hand view into the male mind. Think about it: Who better than a man to tell us how a man thinks??)

In addition to being an all-around good sport Mike is a writer and blogger. If you love delightful prose and poetry (yes, he writes poetry!) check out his blog here.

We put the call out for questions and started receiving immediate responses.

This week’s questions are from Chongo, one of our fans in The Swirl World on Facebook.

NOTE: Chongo’s questions (in red) and Mike’s responses (in blue) are unedited.

Hi TSW!

Happy Thanksgiving. 

My name’s Chongo (Chit) and I’ve been reading your blog and FB page for months (about a year). I’ve been interested in interracial dating & relationships since primary school when my first crush was a cute soft-spoken white boy called Michael. I like men of all races and nationalities and your page is a great space for eye candy, articles and normalising love across colour lines. So thank you for this amazing space – it is serious, fun and everything in between and outside.

 I read about your ‘Mondays with Mike’ from the blog and I’m sending in my questions.

Hello Mike, thanks for enabling this form of interaction. Here are my questions: 

1. Do your family and friends know about your attraction to black women? If affirmative, what was their reaction? Does their reaction (positive or negative) matter to you?

Pretty woman portrait

Hi Chongo, great to make your acquaintance!

Here are the answers to your questions; as good as I can make them.

1 – A few of my friends know, as I have told them, but my family I haven’t. This is not because I am afraid nor ashamed of liking who I like, it’s just that my parents and siblings made things incredibly awkward for me when I was growing up. Any hint of liking a girl meant that they couldn’t help but blurt it out to her while I was standing there, making me go bright red and both of us feel awkward. Another reason is that my siblings have had complicated relationships with the people they went out with (and married) over the years, and a lot of that drama that happened was played out in front of the family. I prefer to keep my relationships close to my heart. In the end it’s myself and the person I am with who matter, not the opinions of anyone else.

These days I think my relatives would likely say “about time!” if I showed up to a family gathering with a girl, and I very much doubt they would care what ethnicity she was. If they had a negative reaction I would be upset, because they wouldn’t be the people I thought they were. However, I don’t think this will be a problem. I’d also let my family know to mind their P’s and Q’s if I were to bring anyone along, regardless of where she was from. I am sure my siblings would give me those kind of knowing looks about the fact I had introduced someone to them, and possibly pull dumb faces and go ‘ooooo-oooh!” when I was near them, but I think they’d get over it  I suspect they’ve been waiting a long time to hassle me about such things and are going to take every opportunity to make me uncomfortable about having a girlfriend there as much as possible, but that’s the price the youngest in the family usually has to pay.

2. What’s your greatest curiosity about black women (bearing in mind we are not a monolith) or what is the one thing you are most curious about vis-a-vis black women? 

2 – An interesting question, and I hope my answer doesn’t come off as pandering or trite. I wonder why some men from different ethnic groups don’t appreciate black women for the wonderful jewels they are. I can’t fathom it myself. I’ve been talking to Michelle, and she has linked me to the song by the Doors called “Hello”, which Jim Morrison wrote after seeing an incredibly gorgeous black woman, but not having the confidence to talk to her. He says as much in the lines “Do you hope to make her see, you fool? Do you hope to pluck this dusky jewel?” I have lived far too long in that mindset, thinking that black women did not want anything to do with white guys (mostly misinformed by TV, movies and music I have to say), but broke the habit some time ago. I guess perhaps a lot of the guys have the same hang-ups I had, in as much as they think they’ll be rebuffed instantly. A lot of the time guys are shy in approaching anyone, but I do hope in the future men of all groups will take the chance and be accepted in return. I’d love to see more of that.

3. What is your idea of a fun date? 

3 – I’d love to spend an day in a place where lots of art and creativity is on display, with all kinds of artists showcasing their talents. Take brunch or lunch at a nice restaurant and discuss what has been seen, and the general small talk about anything which is so fun to have. In the afternoon watch a live band, take in a play or an enjoyable movie, or be content to wander amongst trees and nature in a park. As the sun goes down find a spot for a picnic and toast the last rays of the sun as they disappear over the horizon, and be graced with a wonderful display of colour with the sunset. At night a moonlit walk along the beach holding hands, combined with acting the fool in the low surf as it hits the shore, and a dreamy kiss under the stars. That would be a good day. A very good day.

 

And there you have it, folks – straight from the mouth of our man Mike in Australia. Special thanks to TSW fan Chonogo for submitting those questions.

MIKE MIOCEVICHGot questions for Mike? Send them to us via inbox on Facebook or email them to ASwirlGirl@TheSwirlWorld.com.

Tune in next Monday for more Mondays With Mike!

You can follow Mike on Twitter @500and50 and read his blog at 500and50.com.

 

Join in the Fray: What do you think of Mike’s description of a “fun date?”

Copyright © 2013 Michelle Matthews Calloway, ASwirlGirl™, The Swirl World™, All rights reserved.

 

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Filed Under: Mondays With Mike, Uncategorized Tagged With: 500and50, Australia, Australian, Australian men, Black women, Black. White, blogging, Chongo, dating, Facebook, interracial, interracial dating, interracial marriage, interracial relationships, interracial romance, love, Mike, Mondays, poetry, questions, swirling, United States, Western Australia, Writing

Somewhere in the USA . . . .

November 20, 2012 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 4 Comments

Somewhere in the USA (Arizona, for instance) it’s 11:15 p.m.

It’s also 10:15 in California!

So, technically, it’s still today, November 19, 2012, and I made this blogging deadline.

So there.

(Guess who’s feeling like Homer Simpson right about now?)

~:Le sigh.

Join in the Fray: What have you been late for – really LATE – this week?

Copyright © 2012 Michelle Matthews Calloway, ASwirlGirl™, All rights reserved.

I’m blogging every day in the month of November as a participant in NaBloPoMo. Thanks for reading and feel free to comment!

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Filed Under: Series, Special, Uncategorized Tagged With: Arizona, Blog, California, Fray, Homer Simpson, late, NaBloPoMo, Time, United States

I Am Going to Have To . . . .

November 16, 2012 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway Leave a Comment

. . . . Catch up on this blog tomorrow.

I spent a majority of the day without internet access and now I’m even more behind schedule than I was when I woke up this morning.

Tomorrow my day starts at 5:30 a.m. and I’ll have you know this Night Owl was already in bed . . . only to bolt upright with the realization that I hadn’t made today’s NaBloPoMo post.

I’m going to catch up, lest this be my fate:

Join in the Fray: What do you need to catch up on? 

Copyright © 2012 Michelle Matthews Calloway, ASwirlGirl™, All rights reserved.

I’m blogging every day in the month of November as a participant in NaBloPoMo. Thanks for reading and feel free to comment!

 

 

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Filed Under: Series, Special, Uncategorized Tagged With: Blog, blogging, BlogHer, catch up, Facebook, Fray, ketchup, Michelle Matthews Calloway, NaBloPoMo, November, schedule, United States

Happy Veterans’ Day!

November 11, 2012 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 6 Comments

Hang around me any length of time, and you’ll quickly learn that I’m a Daddy’s Girl (and proud of it!).

You’ll also learn that my Dad is a 23-year career Army man who fought in Korea and in Vietnam.

Today, on Veteran’s Day, I salute my Dad and all the men and women who unselfishly served in the Armed Forces and fought for our freedom and safety.

Thank you for your courage!

Join in the Fray: This week, make an effort to acknowledge, salute, or in some way appreciate a member of the military.

Copyright © 2012 Michelle Matthews Calloway, ASwirlGirl™, All rights reserved.

I’m blogging every day in the month of November as a participant in NaBloPoMo. Thanks for reading and feel free to comment!

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Filed Under: Series, Special, Uncategorized Tagged With: Fray, Korea, men, military, NaBloPoMo, United States, veteran, Veterans Day, Vietnam, women

What’s The World Coming To????

November 5, 2012 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway Leave a Comment

A beautiful blended from the South East of England!
(Clockwise, l to r): Thomas, Faith, Zoe (in Faith’s arms), Miles, and Jaden.

I’m glad you asked!

The world is coming to increased diversity – and increasing numbers of interracial marriages! Reports from the United States Census Bureau (2012) documented increases in the occurrence of interracial marriage, or Swirling as we like to call it. Projections indicate these numbers will continue to rise at a steady pace in coming years.

My interest in topics relating to diversity stems originally from my experiences as an “Army brat” (my father was 23-year career military). I’ve lived all over the world and the United States and experienced exposure to different cultures and ethnicities as a result. Some schools I attended – particularly those on base – were extremely diverse. In other schools I attended my two brothers and me held the then-dubious distinction of being the first and the only Blacks who were enrolled. Even with this background I didn’t start taking interracial dating seriously until 2009, which was the year I entered into an interracial relationship.

I started The Swirl World Facebook page as an off shoot of a PhD residency assignment. The page has grown, and so has my purpose for creating it. It began as an assignment; my goal is now to raise awareness of current and historical events relating to diversity. On the page we explore interracial relationships and marriage, and also lift up biracial and multiracial interests. One of the ways The Swirl World shows our love for this demographic is by striving to be inclusive and welcoming of the biracial and multiracial offspring of these relationships and marriages – we post lots of baby and children’s pictures!

The Swirl World also aggressively pursues the advancement of the appreciation of ethnic and racial culture represented in individuals and nations from around the world. People of color, regardless of their nation of origin, are wonderful, brilliant, artistic, and accomplished, and they need and deserve to be featured in the spotlight. I firmly believe that, like it or not, we all live in The Swirl World because the world reflects a global society marked by diversity.

Resources we draw from for The Swirl World includes news stories, past and current events, pop culture, editorials, blogs, YouTube videos – just about anything reflecting these subjects. Diversity encompasses and influences every human being in one way or another, so in The Swirl World, no subject is taboo if it raises awareness and if it’s in good taste. We don’t do bawdy, tawdry, or disparaging pieces because we want to keep the page on a tasteful, classy level.

I strive to promote the empowerment of Black women, and desire that they expand their dating options by Swirling. I don’t bash or demonize Black men for doing so; interracial dating/marriage is their choice (and statistics show that Black men have been Swirling longer and in far greater numbers than Black women). Across ethnicities, Black women statistically reflect the lowest numbers of interracial marriage – they seem to be the last to “get the memo” to expand their dating and marriage options. The Swirl World seeks to raise a positive awareness of interracial love that will hopefully encourage Black women to make this important lifestyle change. 

Source: United States Census Bureau. (2012). Table 59. Households, families, subfamilies, and married couples: 1980 to 2010. Retrieved from http://www.census.gov/compendia/statab/2012/tables/12s0059.pdf

This month I’m participating in NaBloPoMo, which means I’ll be posting everyday in the month of November. Thanks for joining me – and please do keep reading and commenting!

Copyright © 2012 Michelle Matthews Calloway, ASwirlGirl™, All rights reserved.

Join in the Fray: Census data now reveals that births of brown babies surpass that of whites. How does that make you feel?

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Filed Under: Series, Special Tagged With: biracial, Black, Black people, brown babies, ethnicity, interracial marriage, interracial relationships, Marriage, Miscegenation, mixed, mixed race, multiracial, race, swirling, United States, United States Census Bureau, White people

Fried Alligator and Boudin Balls, Anyone???

October 24, 2012 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 7 Comments

This past weekend I had the distinct pleasure of attending the 76th International Rice Festival in Crowley, LA. For those of you who may be unfamiliar with Louisiana culture, the state’s Department of Tourism reports that Louisiana holds over 400 festivals every year – and is “often called the Festival Capital of America.” The New Orleans Times Picayune  puts it this way:  “If you can eat it, drink it, play it, dance to it or ogle it, there’s a festival for it in south Louisiana. Probably this week.”

With that being said, the Rice Festival provided a delightful expression of diversity in two forms that really matter: People and food! These festivals seem to be the time that everyone pretty much put aside any race-centered or ethnic differences and instead become Louisianans who want to have a good time.

Yep, there was plenty of Swirling going on:

 

Where else in the world can large crowds of Blacks and Whites (with good sprinklings of Asians and Latinos mixed in) listen to and enjoy music like this:

And not only that, DANCE to it: 

AND, in addition to the fried alligator and spicy boudin balls, enjoy a good serving of pig feet or tripe?

This gentleman proudly told me I couldn’t take a photo unless he was in it!

(I purchased some wonderful homemade pralines. My cousin bought a bowl of pig feet – they were seasoned to perfection and delish! Yes, I eat pig feet – don’t judge me).

The truly adventuresome were able to help themselves to good ole helpings of squirrel, rabbit, or shark. Gotta try that shark next time . . . . .

 Join in the fray: What’s the most exotic food you’ve ever eaten? Would you be willing to try fried alligator, boudin balls, squirrel, or shark?

Copyright © 2012 Michelle Matthews Calloway, A Swirl Girl™, All rights reserved.

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Filed Under: Festivals and Events, Uncategorized Tagged With: Alligator, Arts, Arts and Entertainment, Cajun, Creole, culture, dancing, entertainment, International Rice Festival, Louisiana, New Orleans, New Orleans Times Picayune, swirling, Times-Picayune, United States, zydeco

Lovingly Submitted

April 16, 2011 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 4 Comments

In the past couple of weeks I’ve been hearing news and  reading a lot of blogs about the anniversary of the Civil War.

 Of course I’m happy about the outcome. What Black person or person of color – particularly in the United States – wouldn’t be?

Black people have suffered a lot of drama and trauma since May 12-13, 1865, the date of the last reported battle of the War. On both sides soldiers shed a river of blood in that war which is quite a sobering thought, yet today in 2011 we have blowhards like Donald Trump believing he’s being broad-minded and a champion of the people when he makes really intelligent statements asserting that he “has a great relationship with the blacks.”

Sigh.

*_*

Sorry folks, I’m feeling some kinda way about that statement and just had to get that out.

On another note, what the talk of the Civil War anniversary really made me think about was the wonderfully compelling love story of Mildred Jeter and Richard Loving, who in June of 1958 decided to buck the tide of ignorance and racism and pursue their American dream, which was to spend their lives living and loving each other in holy (and legal) matrimony. They had to go to Washington, DC for the ceremony but were arrested in their own bedroom in the middle of the night by sheriff’s deputies for the “crime” of interracial marriage. 

Mildred Loving and her husband Richard P Loving are shown in this January 26, 1965 file photograph

The Lovings were prosecuted by the state and sentenced to a year in prison for their “crime” but allowed to leave Virginia in exile.  

They lived in exile, separated from their families and banished from the home state they loved, for five years and finally grew tired of the fact that they couldn’t live as a married couple in any state they wanted to live. They decided to fight back and in June of 1967, nine years to the month that they were married, in a landmark Supreme Court case they eventually won the right to live and live in marital bliss anywhere in the United States.     

Thankfully, I’m feeling some kinda way about that, too.

Richard and Mildred Loving - Love transcends race

Trump’s statement struck a nerve in me because it made me painfully aware of the fact that racism – whether inherent, overt or covert, real or imagined, never seems to be far from the surface. I’m grateful for the advances that have been made, yet I’m mindful of the fact that 1967 was only 44 years ago.

Yesterday (April 15, 2011) the world premiere of  The Loving Story, a documentary telling the story of Richard and Mildred, debuted at the 13th annual Full Frame Festival in Durham, NC.   

 Though the documentary tells the Lovings’ story of forbidden and what-was-then-illegal interracial love, it also explores the heavier themes of miscegenation and racism.

[Sidenote: Get ready for it (and go ahead and get over it): Those are themes we’ll discuss in upcoming blog posts. You have Donald Trump to thank for that – I had originally intended to keep this blog pretty light but his statement really made me feel some kinda way. Those posts will be lovingly submitted, of course.]

 The Loving’s story had a bittersweet ending. In 1975, 17 years after their marriage, Mildred Loving lost her husband Richard in a tragic car accident. Mildred died in 2008 but she never remarried, and in a statement issued on the 4oth anniversary of the historic Supreme Court decision (June 12, 2007 – the year before she died) she declared:

Richard and Mildred Loving - Reflecting a more perfect union

“ . . . not a day goes by that I don’t think of Richard and our love, our right to marry, and how much it meant to me to have that freedom to marry the person precious to me, even if others thought he was the ‘wrong kind of person’ for me to marry.”

Today I thank God for Richard and Mildred Loving, and for them having a love for one another that transcended the climate and laws of their day. I thank God I live in a country where, like Mildred, I can freely choose the person I believe is the right person for me to marry. And, like Mildred, not a day goes by that I don’t think of SM and our love, our right to marry, and how much it means to me to have the freedom to marry the person most precious to me.

I like to think that God lovingly submitted SM to me – and me to him.

Join in the fray:

What has been “lovingly submitted” to you?


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Filed Under: Special Tagged With: American Civil War, Black, Civil War, Donald Trump, History, interracial, interracial dating, interracial marriage, loving, Marriage, Mildred and Richard Loving, perfect union, Supreme Court, union, United States, Virginia, Washington D.C., white

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Welcome!

I’m Michelle Matthews-Calloway, and I’m A Swirl Girl! Greetings to you from The Swirl World. We encourage Black women to expand their relationship options by dating and marrying interracially. Our overarching mission is to see Black Women live their best life. Come Swirl with us in The Swirl World™, where we celebrate Black women and the diverse men who love us!™

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