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#163| Oh Happy Loving Day!

June 12, 2015 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway Leave a Comment

Today is Loving Day!

I never tire of reading about the wonderfully compelling love story of Mildred Jeter and Richard Loving, who in June of 1958 decided to buck the tide of ignorance and racism and pursue their American dream – which was to spend their lives living and loving each other in holy (and legal) matrimony.

They had to go to Washington, DC for the ceremony but were arrested in their own bedroom in the middle of the night by sheriff’s deputies for the “crime” of interracial marriage.

The Lovings were prosecuted by the state and sentenced to a year in prison for their “crime” but allowed to leave Virginia in exile.

For five years they lived in exile, separated from their families and banished from the home state they loved. The Lovings finally grew tired of the fact that they couldn’t live as a married couple in any state they wanted to live.

They decided to fight back and in June of 1967, nine years to the month they were married, they eventually won the right to live and live in marital bliss anywhere in the United States because of the decision rendered in a landmark Supreme Court case.

These days, turning on the evening news is almost a sure-fire way to remain painfully aware of the fact that racism – whether inherent, overt or covert, real or imagined, never seems to be far from the surface.

I’m grateful for the advances that have been made, yet I’m mindful of the fact that 1967 is merely 48 years ago.

The Loving’s story had a bittersweet ending. In 1975, 17 years after their marriage, Mildred Loving lost her husband Richard in a tragic car accident. Mildred died in 2008 but she never remarried.

In a statement issued on the 4oth anniversary of the historic Supreme Court decision (June 12, 2007 – the year before she died) she declared:

“ . . . not a day goes by that I don’t think of Richard and our love, our right to marry, and how much it meant to me to have that freedom to marry the person precious to me, even if others thought he was the ‘wrong kind of person’ for me to marry.”

I thank God for Richard and Mildred Loving, and for them having a love for one another that transcended the climate and laws of their day.

Richard and Mildred, today we celebrate you – and we celebrate love.

Happy Loving Day!

Today’s featured couple, Tom and Alida Sharp, live in Belize. Alida says they met in high school when Tom “shoved an Oreo® cookie in her mouth!”

They have been married for almost 33 years.

To listen to the story of that Oreo cookie, click here. To learn more about their life in Belize, click here.

The Swirl World Team is committed to sharing 365 days of inspiration in 2015. Our goal is to help you stay motivated and inspired by bringing you positive, uplifting images and corresponding thoughts.

We’d love to FEATURE YOU in one of our Inspiration Daily posts! If you’d like to be featured, please send a nice, clear photo to InspirationDaily@TheSwirlWorld.com.

How To Say Hi To A Guy And Wind Up Married to Him For 20 Years

April 7, 2014 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 3 Comments

We’ve run a post or two on women who made “the first move” and wound up with the man of their dreams.

And yes, we know a big debate exists on whether women should be first to make a move.

Our position on the subject? Suffice it to say that we believe there’s a HUGE difference between being “Thirsty” and being “Friendly” – and a smart woman (and man) is able to tell the difference.

With that out-of-the-way, meet another couple who exemplifies our theme of Ordinary People . . . Extraordinary Love:

Niecy and Jeff Aldrich!

Niecy and Jeff Aldrich’s wedding photo

Niecy shared this beautiful photo below of her and Jeff on our Facebook page and it generated tons of comments and likes. We just had to get their story – and get ready to be surprised, because what Niecy did was . . . well, read on and find out!

Where do you live?

We live in Suffolk, VA

How long you have been together?

Almost half my life! We’ve been together 22 years and married almost 20 of those years.

What are the names and ages of your children and/or grandchildren?

Oh Wow! I was divorced with 3 children when we met and yet . . . Are you getting why I love this man so much???

Any who, our children’s names are Connis (who is now 29), Zavier (now 28), Letia (26 now) and Jovani, now 13.

We also have 5 grandchildren; Elijah 8, Kamiyah 6, Kylie 5, Dexter 4 and Cayden is 18 months:

Whew! Seems like a lot when you spell it out but I love them all as one. They make me crazy and happy all at once.

13-year old Javoni

How/where did you meet?

We met in Florida, my home state at the Mayport Naval Station … I can see it in my head, me walking around with my girls trying to look cute (lol!)

I remember passing this group of guys that was trying to get my attention. I kept walking of course, but on the way back he (Jeff) caught my eye.

I thought it would probably annoy his friends if I stopped to talk to him (the only White guy in the group), so I did (smile).

I was going to annoy them all and then move on but when I stepped up to him and said “Hello,” he gave me this quizzical look as if to say, “Me?”

It was his eyes . . . they grabbed me. I said something really lame like, “I’m going to marry you and have a daughter with those eyes…. 1 out of 3 ain’t bad – I’ll take it! Lol!

What was your defining moment – that moment when you each knew you were in love?

The moment he met my children and didn’t bat an eye, I knew he was sent to me for my soul mate.

How did you families and friends respond to the news of your relationship? How did you handle it?

My family is literally a melting pot and I grew up around interracial couples, so my family was fine with us.

Some of my friends – or ex-friends, I should say – were a different story. I was called a “sellout” among other things. I had one so-called friend ask me, “How can you sleep with a white man?”

I had a big fight with one that said “White people smell like wet dogs.” Needless to say I showed her the door face first … I know violence was not the right response but it felt good at the time.

Despite all the negativity we encountered at the beginning we held hands, kept our heads up and ignored the looks and comments. To make a very long story short . . . . Love truly is blind, deaf and dumb, too.

What do you like most about your mate?

The thing I’ve always loved the most about Jeff is the way he loves me! When he says he loves me I can feel it. I see it when he looks at me. He has never wavered in his love for me.

What advice would you give to others who are interested in dating/marrying interracially?

The only advice I could give is to love yourself first. That way, when love comes in whatever way, shape or form you will recognize it.

Any parting words?

All I have left is, “I Love You Jeff, more today than yesterday. I’m so grateful that God blessed me with you!”

Jeff Aldrich, who is currently deployed

One more thing, Ladies don’t be shy – take a chance. Walk over; say hi to a guy you like . . . This could be you 22 years from today!

All we have to say is, being friendly certainly worked for Niecy!

Join in the Fray: How do YOU define “Thirsty” and “Friendly?”

All rights reserved. All work is the copyright of the respective owner, otherwise copyright © 2014 Michelle Matthews Calloway, ASwirlGirl™, The Swirl World™, Dallas, TX, USA. Photos used with permission.

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Lovingly Submitted

April 16, 2011 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 4 Comments

In the past couple of weeks I’ve been hearing news and reading a lot of blogs about the anniversary of the Civil War.

Of course I’m happy about the outcome. What Black person or person of color – particularly in the United States – wouldn’t be?

Black people have suffered a lot of drama and trauma since May 12-13, 1865, the date of the last reported battle of the War. On both sides soldiers shed a river of blood in that war which is quite a sobering thought, yet today in 2011 we have blowhards like Donald Trump believing he’s being broad-minded and a champion of the people when he makes really intelligent statements asserting that he “has a great relationship with the blacks.”

Sigh.

*_*

Sorry folks, I’m feeling some kinda way about that statement and just had to get that out.

On another note, what the talk of the Civil War anniversary really made me think about was the wonderfully compelling love story of Mildred Jeter and Richard Loving, who in June of 1958 decided to buck the tide of ignorance and racism and pursue their American dream, which was to spend their lives living and loving each other in holy (and legal) matrimony. They had to go to Washington, DC for the ceremony but were arrested in their own bedroom in the middle of the night by sheriff’s deputies for the “crime” of interracial marriage.

Mildred Loving and her husband Richard P Loving are shown in this January 26, 1965 file photograph

The Lovings were prosecuted by the state and sentenced to a year in prison for their “crime” but allowed to leave Virginia in exile.

They lived in exile, separated from their families and banished from the home state they loved, for five years and finally grew tired of the fact that they couldn’t live as a married couple in any state they wanted to live. They decided to fight back and in June of 1967, nine years to the month that they were married, in a landmark Supreme Court case they eventually won the right to live and live in marital bliss anywhere in the United States.

Thankfully, I’m feeling some kinda way about that, too.

Richard and Mildred Loving - Love transcends race

Trump’s statement struck a nerve in me because it made me painfully aware of the fact that racism – whether inherent, overt or covert, real or imagined, never seems to be far from the surface. I’m grateful for the advances that have been made, yet I’m mindful of the fact that 1967 was only 44 years ago.

Yesterday (April 15, 2011) the world premiere of The Loving Story, a documentary telling the story of Richard and Mildred, debuted at the 13^th annual Full Frame Festival in Durham, NC.

Though the documentary tells the Lovings’ story of forbidden and what-was-then-illegal interracial love, it also explores the heavier themes of miscegenation and racism.

[Sidenote: Get ready for it (and go ahead and get over it): Those are themes we’ll discuss in upcoming blog posts. You have Donald Trump to thank for that – I had originally intended to keep this blog pretty light but his statement really made me feel some kinda way. Those posts will be lovingly submitted, of course.]

The Loving’s story had a bittersweet ending. In 1975, 17 years after their marriage, Mildred Loving lost her husband Richard in a tragic car accident. Mildred died in 2008 but she never remarried, and in a statement issued on the 4oth anniversary of the historic Supreme Court decision (June 12, 2007 – the year before she died) she declared:

Richard and Mildred Loving - Reflecting a more perfect union

“ . . . not a day goes by that I don’t think of Richard and our love, our right to marry, and how much it meant to me to have that freedom to marry the person precious to me, even if others thought he was the ‘wrong kind of person’ for me to marry.”

Today I thank God for Richard and Mildred Loving, and for them having a love for one another that transcended the climate and laws of their day. I thank God I live in a country where, like Mildred, I can freely choose the person I believe is the right person for me to marry. And, like Mildred, not a day goes by that I don’t think of SM and our love, our right to marry, and how much it means to me to have the freedom to marry the person most precious to me.

I like to think that God lovingly submitted SM to me – and me to him.

Join in the fray:

What has been “lovingly submitted” to you?

#163| Oh Happy Loving Day!

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