Though we are not a dating site by any means, here at The Swirl World we pride ourselves on the quality of connections we make.
Our man Mike in Australia is no exception. We love him to pieces, Adrienne and I, and he feels the same way about us.
We met providentially – and then lo and behold, Cupid got in the mix!
Remember the movie Eat, Pray, Love starring Julia Roberts?
For many of us, love is a process. Sometimes Love finds us – or better yet, we find it – in the strangest of ways.
Cue the roses, wine and violins, because this one is a doozy! We’ll let Mike tell you:
The Fear Factor
We’re often convinced that things are either going to plan, coasting in neutral, or falling apart completely.
While we do have a great deal of control over our lives, sometimes we can be too afraid of what we think is a loss of control, and embrace the certainty that comes with fear of the unknown, and stick to what we know.
This isn’t something unnatural, as everyone needs to have a strong foundation from which they can start from, and rely upon to be unchanging in their lives. But that’s what it just is – a foundation.
You need to be able to build up and branch out from those places, and not just rely on the solitary comforts they provide. Otherwise you wake up one day thinking to yourself that your time has passed you by, and you had a chance before but now it’s gone and there is no bringing it back.
You could use that as a justification to sticking with what you know, resigning yourself to the fact that this is as good as it gets, and that’s that.
Fate Versus Destiny – The Power Of A Moment
Or, you could do something else. I believe a moment acted upon is a moment that is never lost, and can often bring great rewards and opportunities.
It’s the question of fate versus destiny. You could say they mean essentially the same thing, but that’s never rung true for me. It seems that fate is something which happens if you believe that things can’t ever change, that the time you had to be adventurous and excited has gone, and you’re stuck where you are.
Destiny, I believe, is what happens when you take action, no matter what it is, and strike out into the unknown. You never know where it’s going to take you. It looks dangerous, you might get hurt, and you’ll definitely have your setbacks.
But it’s also thrilling. And it’s also life affirming. It makes you feel something strong to the core of your marrow, and often rewards you well for taking the first step.
What Happened When I Stopped Falling For The Okey-Doke
So, what does this have to do with Swirling? Well I’ll tell you. For a long while I thought that black women weren’t interested in white men. I was caught by that lie hook, line and sinker. Then I randomly searched on YouTube one day and found I was completely mistaken. One video led to the next and then to the next, which led me to a YouTube channel. I thought I would send a message to via their Facebook page, saying how much I loved what they did and thanked them for encouraging swirling.
Turns out I sent the message to the wrong page, but struck up a great conversation with Michelle and Adrienne, Admins of The Swirl World. They were fantastically warm and inviting, great with a conversation (which we’ve held for a long time now), and really encouraging.
It’s from there I told them about my writing, which they encouraged again, to poetry, to saying I should post poetry for women on #blackgirlsunday on twitter, to me doing so and having a great reception and lots of fun, to finding a girl on there who was really great to talk to, and ending up finding her as my muse for a lot of my creativity, and developing an ongoing relationship with her!
The Power Of One Small Step
If I had not made that first small step, which led me to message the wrong page (which in the end turned out to be the right one!), I’d still be back where I was 6 months ago.
I can tell you that in the last 6 months I have fallen in love with my life once again. I live for feeling my heart flutter, the closeness, the love, the passion and inspiration. And even if this were to end in heartbreak (which I am quite intent on making sure does not happen), I would have to be glad and thankful for this opportunity to show love and have this happiness.
So my main thought today is this – Put yourself out there. Take the chance; you never know where you’ll be taken by the simplest of actions!
You’ll grow stronger than you had ever thought and be richer for it, guaranteed. That’s why I am so glad to see the Swirl World getting people to open up, put themselves out there, and find what they want in life.
Go for it people, you have nothing to lose.
Editor’s Note: Stay tuned for updates in this unfolding love story!
Join in the Fray: What small step do YOU need to make?
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Copyright © 2013 Michelle Matthews Calloway, ASwirlGirl™, The Swirl World™, All rights reserved.