vetting Archives - The Swirl World

Vetting A Racist – Can You Handle It?

June 20, 2017 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 2 Comments

Rachel Robinson encountered a variety of men during Seasons 1-3 of 50 Days of Dating.

Unfortunately, she encountered a closet racist.

Watch this brief snippet from Season 1 – Episode 36, as Rachel describes the encounter:

Later, Adrienne London Leach examined what happened. In this podcast episode she shares some important vetting tips, particularly if you find yourself dealing with a racist.

Vetting A Racist – Can You Handle It?

If you cannot see the podcast player, click here or here.

You can also listen to the show on iTunes, Google Play, Stitcher Radio, PlayerFM – and now on iHeart Radio!

Want to be a guest on The Swirl World Podcast, or know someone who should?

Send an email to Podcast@TheSwirlWorld.com.

Be sure to “Like” The Swirl World on Facebook and subscribe to the podcast on iTunes.

You can also listen to the show on iTunes, Google Play, Stitcher Radio, PlayerFM – and now on iHeart Radio!

Get In On The Fun – Join Us For Vetting 101!

April 7, 2016 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway Leave a Comment

So, the “April’s Fools” post was extremely popular.

Our meme advised a truth from Joey Adams: “Never let a fool kiss you – or a kiss fool you!”

I thought about the quote and realized there are only a couple of ways we can be assured of not kissing a fool: either we don’t kiss at all, or we vet.

Vet – That’s It!

Thus was born the series I’m doing in the month of April entitled, “Vetting 101.”

So what’s vetting, you ask?

Vetting means “to appraise, verify or check for accuracy, authenticity or validity.”

Possessing and exercising good vetting skills is essential for experiencing dating success.

Want to be kissed by a fool? Don’t vet.

Want to kiss a fool? Don’t vet.

Needless to say, the members of Swirl Nation are not about that foolish life, so if we don’t know how to vet properly, we will learn.

We will learn – and we will apply what we learn!

Join Me For Vetting 101

So consider this your open invitation to join me every weekday during the month of April, when I hop on Facebook Live and on Periscope to share what I trust will be useful information on how to vet properly.

Here’s the Facebook Live video from Day 3:

To join me on Facebook Live, click here. To join me on Periscope, click here.

To listen to the podcast episode entitled “Internet Love” featuring The Romance Arsonist Gynger Fyer and her beau, M, click here.

Already married, engaged or otherwise boo-ed up? Then share this post with that family member, friend or co-worker who’s single!

—

The Swirl World Team is committed to sharing inspiration in 2016. Our goal is to help you stay motivated and inspired by bringing you positive, uplifting images and corresponding thoughts.

We’d love to FEATURE YOU in one of our posts! If you’d like to be featured, please send a nice, high-resolution photo to InspirationDaily@TheSwirlWorld.com.

Copyright ©2016 Michelle Matthews Calloway, The Swirl World LLC , ASwirlGirl™, The Swirl World™, The Swirl World Podcast™, The Swirl World Inspiration Daily™, Swirl Nation™, All rights reserved. Photo property of The Swirl World™.

We Got Married The Same Weekend We Met!

October 23, 2014 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 4 Comments

Do you love yourself, and are you comfortable in your own skin?

When it comes to relationships, do you know yourself well enough to know who you are and what you want in life?

Have you set boundaries and established your deal breakers and the terms you consider non-negotiable?

If this describes you, listen up.

If this doesn’t describe you, listen up anyway, because you’re going to hear some things that will help you in your quest to become the best you that you can be.

You know what happens when you meet someone who potentially seems like a great candidate for a life partner?

You vet, vet, and then vet some more.

And then, you make an educated decision – and you ACT.

That’s what Tia and Josh Delano did.

They met on Facebook, and –

DISCLAIMER:

Tia Delano shares the interesting story of how she and her husband Josh met (on Facebook) and married (the same weekend they met). This is what can happen when (1) You know yourself, (2) You know what you want/don’t want, and (3) You vet. Very. Well!

To listen to the episode on Sound Cloud, click here.

Tia, Josh and their bundle of Joy (pun intended!)

Did you know The Swirl World has a Facebook page devoted exclusively to Military Swirl Couples? Click here to view photos of active duty and retired military couples from around the world, and read their stories.

Want to be a guest on the podcast, or know someone who should? Send an email to Podcast@TheSwirlWorld.com.

Be sure to “Like” The Swirl World on Facebook and subscribe to the podcast on iTunes.

You can also follow us on Sound Cloud and listen to the show on Stitcher Radio!

Podcast Episode 017b: You Know YOU’RE Cray-Cray When . . . . Part 2 (Special Guest: Eugenia Berg)

July 26, 2014 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 1 Comment

Hopefully by now you’ve listened to Part 1 of “You Know YOU’RE Cray-Cray When . . . . “ featuring our special guest and beloved friends, blogger and vlogger Mrs. Eugenia Berg of the blog/vlog “Married Girl In A Weird World.”

In between the laughter and hilarity, Eugenia shared some truths and great vetting pointers – all of which she is known for. Check out her vlogs on vetting by clicking here and here.

In this episode, Adrienne, Eugenia and me each share our take (and Eugenia shares some experiences) on what constitutes “Cray-Cray” in dating – crazy habits and “first date” shenanigans that kill a relationship before it even begins. Texting, stalking, random behavior – you name it!

Our girl Eugenia is expecting TWINS and has only one more month to go, so she’s on hiatus. Please send lots of love and prayers her way!

We hope to have her back on the show at some point in the future.

Until then, you would do well to go check out Eugenia’s blog and give the podcast a listen!

Want to be a guest on the podcast, or know someone who should? Send an email to Podcast@TheSwirlWorld.com. Be sure to “Like” The Swirl World on Facebook and subscribe to the podcast on iTunes. You can also listen to the show on Sound Cloud.

Podcast Episode 003: Eugenia Berg of “Married Girl In A Weird World!”

June 14, 2014 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway Leave a Comment

Words cannot describe how HAPPY we were to have veteran blogger and vlogger Mrs. Eugenia Berg of the blog/vlog “Married Girl In A Weird World.”

I say it and I’ll keep saying it: Eugenia Berg’s “Single Girl In a Weird World” was the FIRST blog I subscribed to. I’ve been following her since then, and not only did she eventually become “Married Girl In A Weird World,” she and her handsome hubby are now expecting TWINS! Woot Woot!)

Eugenia and Matt at a recent baby shower

I looked forward to her posts, and I was happy when she started vlogging and putting her posts on YouTube.

I had a special ritual: When I received an email notification that she’s put up a video on YouTube, I would wait until I got home to watch it. I normally read a chapter of a book before I go to sleep. Well, when Eugenia did a post, that video would be my “end of the day” treat to watch before I went to sleep.

I can’t say enough good things about her – Eugenia is beyond wonderful and Adrienne and I feel blessed and privileged to be connected with her.

Want some FREE coaching on Vetting? Eugenia’s blog is a premiere source. She did a series on the subject, and if you’re smart, you’ll give a listen to what she has to say here, here and here.

Shucks, Eugenia’s entire blog constitutes free coaching on a variety of subjects. Again, if you’re smart, you’ll run, not walk right on over to her blog and get you some, because the woman drops some serious wisdom.

Eugenia’s tagline is: “The best part is I’ve lived it so I know what I’m talking about.”

Indeed! Her knowledge and her passion shine through her words and her voice.

The podcast with Eugenia was so much fun; we plan to have her on the show regularly!

Listen to the episode and you’ll understand why. Woot Woot!

Want to be a guest on the podcast, or know someone who should? Send an email to Podcast@TheSwirlWorld.com. Be sure to “Like” The Swirl World on Facebook and subscribe to the podcast on iTunes.

How To Meet Your Prince/Princess Without Kissing A Lot Of Frogs

March 19, 2014 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway Leave a Comment

We’ve all heard the saying: “You have to kiss a lot of frogs in order to find your Prince/Princess.”

While that saying may hold true for some and may even be the story of your life to this point, we in The Swirl World want you to take heart and ponder these questions:

What if finding true love didn’t have to be so hard?? What if there really ARE some good men and women out there who would make wonderful mate – and how in the world can I meet him/her?

Our Facebook page is On Fire with lots of great single men and women who have heard the same tired proverb, and are asking themselves the very same questions.

They’re attractive, smart, well-adjusted and possess many good character traits.

They’re not loony and they’re not cray-cray.

Stalking? They’re not about that life.

They’re also not lazy, trifling, good-for-nothing or looking for a free ride.

Their intent is to “do no harm” and give 100% to a relationship.

They want to do someone good, and not evil, all the days of his/her life.

They want to be in a relationship for the long haul.

If you’re interested in a booty call, cat-fishing or a fly-by-night relationship, YOU’VE GOT THE WRONG ONE, BABY.

They simply want a chance to love – and be loved.

If this sounds like you, then The Swirl World is where you need to be.

Starting tomorrow, we’re going to present some Swirling “Princes and Princesses” who may just be the person who qualifies as “Your Last First Kiss.”

***************************DISCLAIMER*****************************

If we profile someone you take a fancy to and you connect with them, will you still have to vet him/her??

OF. COURSE. YOU. WILL!

(And just in case you didn’t know it, OF. COURSE. YOU. WILL!)

This is Adrienne and Me – giving you major side eye.

Yes, YOU will still have to get to know a person, Yes, YOU will still have to vet, vet, vet – and VET AGAIN.

Presenting people is on us – VETTING IS ON YOU.

This bears repeating:

Yes, YOU will still have to get to know a person, Yes, YOU will still have to vet, vet, vet – and VET AGAIN.

Presenting people is on us – VETTING IS ON YOU.

And just in case you need a crash course on vetting, we very happily refer you to the Queen of Vetting herself, Mrs. Eugenia Berg, a.k.a. “Married Girl In A Weird World.”

(We’re happy to report that Mrs. Berg and her loving hubby are now expecting TWINS! Woot Woot!)

Mrs. Berg was kind enough to supply free coaching information on vetting on her blog.

Whether you believe you know how to properly vet or not, If you have any brains at all, you will thank the good Lord for Eugenia’s free advice and give a listen here, here and here.

So now, on the subject of vetting: Have we made ourselves perfectly clear?

Ok; by the look on your face, we have made ourselves PERFECTLY clear.

If we have, stay tuned. Our first “Swirling Single” will be presented tomorrow!

Till then, Swirl On.

Join in the Fray: Are you a Prince/Princess – or a Frog?

Want to be profiled here on the blog and on our Facebook page? Contact us via inbox on Facebook or send an email to Profiles@TheSwirlWorld.com.

Date Smarter – Not Harder!

January 16, 2013 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 2 Comments

Woman given roses

Yesterday our Admin ~all posted an interesting question over on The Swirl World’s Facebook page.

(By the way, if you haven’t visited or “Liked” our page, you’re missing out on a treat: Lots of lively discussions, informative posts celebrating people of color, and spotlights on the fans. What? You’re not over there yet? What are you waiting for???)

This is the question that ~all posed:

Hi Swirlers,
Would like your insight. Some of you have tried or met through on-line dating sites. Some of you have been successful and some have not, so without naming any names of sites, give some helpful pointers? ~all

A number of people – guys and gals – weighed in on the question by sharing their views and relaying what they had encountered. Some of the accounts were positive; others, not so much. Reading the thread made me think not only of my own dating experiences, but also the practical advice I give to those who decide to try online dating:

Just remember that he (or she) should be very willing to come out from behind the computer and MEET YOU IN PERSON. Ladies, if he lives in another city, let him come to visit YOU FIRST. A man should be willing to make an effort to meet/get to know you – HE should be the pursuer, NOT you. Don’t act/be thirsty and desperate! Meet at a neutral place; no way should you go to someone’s home or they to yours until you are thoroughly comfortable and some guidelines/boundaries have been established (as well as a relationship). He/she should not meet your children until you have an established RELATIONSHIP and you have vetted, vetted, and VETTED SOME MORE. Be observant and listen to your instincts; if something feels “off” or “not quite right,” it probably isn’t.

I know this advice may seem “old-fashioned” to some of you in this modern age, but this is my advice and I’m sticking to it. I’ve seen far too many people (especially women) make foolish mistakes and sometimes suffer HEARTBREAKING consequences when they didn’t. I wish everybody well and want all of us to be successful in relationships and love. Peace and blessings! ~ASwirlGirl

Call me old-fashioned if you like, but I’ve heard far too many horror stories from women who were too accommodating, or failed to use plain common sense. I can’t stress enough how important it is to vet a potential suitor. Bohemian blogger Dee Dee Russell, creator of the Black Women With Other Brothers Facebook page and blog, makes a very strong case for the importance of vetting in her post Black Women With Other Brothers: The Five Basic Swirling Rules I’ve Learned. YouTube vlogger Eugenia Berg, who also blogs at Married Girl in a Weird World, extensively discusses online dating and vetting, part one and part two.

Information abounds for the smart, savvy woman (or man) who wants to successfully navigate online (and offline line) dating. What every woman – and Black women in particular – needs to remember is that no prospect should be exempt from a good, thorough vetting. Regardless of ethnicity, men are men (and women are women), and nobody should get an automatic pass based on something as superficial as race.

Be wary of “Catfish” and what Dee Dee Russell calls “Keyboard Romeos.” I can’t say it enough: Vet, vet, vet and then vet again.

The choice is always yours – you can date smarter, or date harder.

Join in the Fray: What dating smarter or vetting tips can you share?

I’m blogging every day in the month of January in Blogher’s NaBloPoMo Challenge. Thanks for reading, and feel free to comment!

Vetting A Racist – Can You Handle It?

Vetting A Racist – Can You Handle It?

Want to be a guest on The Swirl World Podcast, or know someone who should?

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Get In On The Fun – Join Us For Vetting 101!

Vet – That’s It!

Join Me For Vetting 101

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We Got Married The Same Weekend We Met!

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Podcast Episode 003: Eugenia Berg of “Married Girl In A Weird World!”

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How To Meet Your Prince/Princess Without Kissing A Lot Of Frogs

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Date Smarter – Not Harder!

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Vetting A Racist – Can You Handle It?

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Vet – That’s It!

Join Me For Vetting 101

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