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The Swirl World

Celebrating and Elevating Black Women - mind, body, soul and spirit!


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A Black Woman In Russia And Belize

August 4, 2014 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 2 Comments

alida_lgOur good friend and mentor Lorraine Spencer knows the most interesting people. Not only is she extremely well-connected, she is what I call a Master Connector.

Lorraine is the bees knees when it comes to introducing and connecting people, and we have her to thank for introducing us to today’s guest: a Black woman who lived in Russia and now lives in Belize.

Men’s Podcast Editor Mark Custard and I had the pleasure of chatting up Alida Wright Sharp.

Alida, her husband Tom and their two boys formerly lived in Russia. She and Tom now live in Belize as missionaries and volunteers for CDF Belize, an organization focused on assisting sexually exploited women and children.

We conversed with Alida via Google Hangouts and had a blast. She describes what living in Russia was like and schooled us on life in Belize.

We were surprised to learn that Alida’s encounters with racism and disdain for her interracial marriage never happened overseas; instead, she and Tom experienced racism . . . . . in the States.

Alida extolls the virtues of Black women traveling and living abroad, talks about how she and her husband met (Oreo cookie, anyone?) and tells us about her new CD project.

I believe you’ll find her account extremely eye-opening.

Enjoy!

You can also listen to the podcast on Sound Cloud.

10441216_10152509470969187_7965351480029079568_nTo find Alida on the web, you can contact her via her record company by clicking here. Send her a friend request on Facebook by clicking here. Follow her on Twitter @AlidasTurn, on Tumbler at MsAlida and on Instagram at Ms.Alida.

Tom and Alida’s mission agency:

DBR Ministries for Tom and Alida Sharp

P.O. Box 279 Sanford, NC, 27330

919-478-6237 Phone 919-718-0350 FAX

Email: dbrministries@yahoo.com

Donations of any size are greatly appreciated!

If you would like to give a simple gift directly to Alida and Tom you may do so through PayPal. Just use the email address alidasmail@gmail.com.

Want to be a guest on the podcast, or know someone who should? Send an email to Podcast@TheSwirlWorld.com. Be sure to “Like” The Swirl World on Facebook and subscribe to the podcast on iTunes. You can also follow us on Sound Cloud and listen to the show on Stitcher Radio!

Copyright © 2014  Michelle Matthews Calloway, ASwirlGirl™, The Swirl World™, The Swirl World Podcast™,  All rights reserved. Photos used with permission.

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Filed Under: BW/WM, Podcast, Special, Uncategorized Tagged With: Alida Wright Sharp, Belize, Black, Black women, foreign missionary, interracial, interracial marriage, interracial relationships, Lorraine Spencer, Mark Custard, podcast, Russia, travel, white, White men

It’s Never Too Late For Love!

July 4, 2014 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 1 Comment

Mary Ellen and Dakota Danuser 2

See this gorgeous couple right here?

No, they’re not 20-something, 30-something or even 40-something, but thanks to the fact that love has no age limit, they are living life to the fullest and enjoying a vibrant relationship with each other.

We first heard from Mr. Dakota and Mrs. Mary Ellen Danuser back in March of this year. Mary Ellen contacted us on our Facebook page and had this to say:

“I would like to add a picture on this page of my husband and I. We will have been married 13 years this coming April 13th and together for 18 years. He is my rock and definitely treats me with respect and dignity. We met at a Financial Company called Primerica. We are very committed to each other and are pretty much inseparable. I wanted to submit our picture and story because I seldom see older Swirlers portrayed on your page. I am in the process of writing a book about Interracial Relationships of all races.”

You know what? Mary Ellen was right: Much ado is made of younger Swirl couples. She wasn’t “hating,” she was pointing out a simple truth.

Thankfully, even though the majority of the photos we posted were of much younger couples, the fact remains that men and women of ALL ages are Swirling!

Mary Ellen wants Black Women to know that regardless of their age or place in life (she was divorced with grown children) meeting a quality man is very possible. Dakota, a retired Marine, shares his perspective on life as a White man married to a Black woman.

Mary Ellen and her husband Dakota are living proof.

Mary Ellen and Dakota Danuser 1

Age really is just a number. It’s never too late for love!

Listen to the Danuser’s story and gain inspiration. (Find out who made the first move – you’ll be surprised!)

We can’t wait until Mary Ellen’s book is published!

Want to be a guest on the podcast, or know someone who should? Send an email to Podcast@TheSwirlWorld.com. Be sure to “Like” The Swirl World on Facebook and subscribe to the podcast on iTunes. You can also follow us on Sound Cloud and listen to the show on Stitcher Radio!

Copyright © 2014 Michelle Matthews Calloway, ASwirlGirl™, The Swirl World™, The Swirl World Podcast™, All rights reserved. Photos used with permission.

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Filed Under: BW/WM, Podcast, Uncategorized Tagged With: after 50, Black, Black women, Black. White, Dakota, dating, Facebook, interracial, interracial dating, interracial marriage, interracial relationships, interracial romance, life after 50, love, Mary Ellen, mature, seasoned, swirling

This Radio Executive Loves Black Women!

June 26, 2014 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway Leave a Comment

Jeff Lyons 2I tell you, we are on a serious roll over here in The Swirl World!

The emails and in-boxes on Facebook are coming in hot and heavy, and we’re beyond excited by the bevy of men who want to make know their preference of dating and marrying Black women.

We caught up with Jeff Lyons, a busy radio executive living in Oxnard, CA.

Jeff traces his romantic preferences for Black women back to his high school days, and he was happy to tell Adrienne and me all about it.

We were especially excited to speak with Jeff because he also recently became a member of The Swirl World Team. In addition to joining us on future podcasts, Jeff will also be writing an advice column called “Just Ask Jeff.” 

Got a question about interracial dating, mating and relating? Just Ask Jeff! Send your questions to Podcast@TheSwirlWorld.com.

Learn more about Jeff on the podcast:

10298807_10203291725750499_7454142882499378729_nJeff is one friendly guy. You can find him on Facebook here.

Want to be a guest on the podcast, or know someone who should? Send an email to Podcast@TheSwirlWorld.com. Be sure to “Like” The Swirl World on Facebook and subscribe to the podcast on iTunes. You can also follow us on Sound Cloud and listen to the show on Stitcher Radio!

Copyright © 2014  Michelle Matthews Calloway, ASwirlGirl™, The Swirl World™, The Swirl World Podcast™,  All rights reserved. Photos used with permission.

 

 

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Filed Under: Just Ask Jeff, Uncategorized Tagged With: Black, Black women, executive, interracial dating, interracial love, interracial marriage, interracial romance, Jeff Lyons, Just Ask Jeff, podcast, radio, swirl, swirling, white, White men

“I Love Black Women!”

June 19, 2014 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway Leave a Comment

Mark Custard 3Adrienne and I enjoyed a great conversation with Mark Custard, a White guy who proudly proclaims, “I love Black women!”

Mark’s a native of Buffalo, NY and has dated Black women almost exclusively since 9th grade.

He makes some interesting observations – namely, that in his first interracial relationship he didn’t care or pay any attention to the ethnicity of his girlfriend – what he enjoyed was all about how much fun they had and how she made him feel.

Give the podcast a listen.

 

Good news:

Mark is joining The Swirl World team with a new column, “On Another Note.” He’s also going to join us on some upcoming podcast episodes. Woot! Woot!

To send Mark a friend request on Facebook, click here.

Want to be a guest on the podcast, or know someone who should? Send an email to Podcast@TheSwirlWorld.com.

Be sure to “Like” The Swirl World on Facebook and subscribe to the podcast on iTunes. You can also follow us on Sound Cloud or listen to us on Stitcher!

Copyright © 2014  Michelle Matthews Calloway, ASwirlGirl™, The Swirl World™, The Swirl World Podcast™,  All rights reserved. Photos used with permission.

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Filed Under: And On Another Note, Announcements, Podcast, Series, Special, Uncategorized Tagged With: Black, Black women, Buffalo, dating, interracial, interracial dating, interracial marraige, interracial romance, life, love, Mark Custard, Marriage, New York, NY, On Another Note, swirl, swirling, team, video, white, White men

This Girl Is On FIRE – Gynger Fyer!

June 16, 2014 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 2 Comments

Gynger Fyer The Romance Arsonist

She’s Hott!

She’s Hott!

This girl is on Fire!!!!

Gynger Fyer, that is!

The Swirl World was smoking hot in Podcast 006 because our guest was none other than:

Gynger Fyer, The Romance Arsonist.

You heard read right: Gynger Fyer, The Romance Arsonist..

Gynger is an interracial romance author – and not just any old interracial romance: Gynger writes erotic interracial romance novels.

Imma let that marinate.

Mmm hmmm.

Ahem.

Here’s a little more on Gynger:

Gynger Fyer (pronounced Ginger Fire) prides herself on writing stories as unique, spicy and fiery as her name. An avid reader and fan of interracial romance and erotic fiction, she now has the pleasure of writing entertaining stories about love, romance, and relationships.

Gynger loves to explore the endless possibilities and outcomes of her characters meeting and falling in love. For her, it all starts with one question…”WHAT IF?”

“What if?” indeed!

Gynger just released a new book: Under The Bayou Moon. It’s her first paranormal interracial romance and she tells us all about it in the podcast.

Don’t tell my Mama I have it all loaded and ready to read on my Kindle rat nah . . . . yeah, baby!

Gynger Fyer Under The Bayou Moon Book Cover

 

Chatting with Gynger was an absolute blast. She’s warm, witty and so very personable.

(Just so you know, Gynger was so much fun, she’s coming back for another episode on a different topic! Stay tuned.)

If you’ve been wanting to write romance novels and don’t have a clue about how to begin, then listen up because Gynger gives the steps she took. She also tells us her secret to “finding the time” to write.

We discussed life, love, breaking into the field of writing romance novels and what she does to write . . . erotica!

Listen to the episode and get an earful. Woot Woot!

Gynger Fyer The Romance Arsonist 2

 

Visit Gynger’s website at GyngerFyer.com. To read her blog, click here.  Follow Gynger on Twitter @GyngerFyer. If you’re on Facebook, you can keep up with Gynger’s latest releases (and photos of HOTT interracial couples) by clicking here.

Want to be a guest on the podcast, or know someone who should? Send an email to Podcast@TheSwirlWorld.com. Be sure to “Like” The Swirl World on Facebook and subscribe to the podcast on iTunes. You can also follow us on Sound Cloud!

Copyright © 2014  Michelle Matthews Calloway, ASwirlGirl™, The Swirl World™, The Swirl World Podcast™,  All rights reserved. Photos used with permission.

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Filed Under: Podcast, Series, Special, Uncategorized Tagged With: Black, Black women, Black. White, book, dating, erotic, erotica, fiction, Gynger Fyer, interracial, interracial dating, interracial relationships, interracial romance, love, Marriage, paranormal, paranormal fiction, romance author, romance novels

Podcast Episode 003: Eugenia Berg of “Married Girl In A Weird World!”

June 14, 2014 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway Leave a Comment

Eugenia BergWords cannot describe how HAPPY we were to have veteran blogger and vlogger Mrs. Eugenia Berg of the blog/vlog “Married Girl In A Weird World.” 

I say it and I’ll keep saying it: Eugenia Berg’s “Single Girl In a Weird World” was the FIRST blog I subscribed to. I’ve been following her since then, and not only did she eventually become “Married Girl In A Weird World,” she and her handsome hubby are now expecting TWINS! Woot Woot!)

Eugenia and Matt at a recent baby shower

Eugenia and Matt at a recent baby shower

I looked forward to her posts, and I was happy when she started vlogging and putting her posts on YouTube.

I had a special ritual:  When I received an email notification that she’s put up a video on YouTube, I would wait until I got home to watch it. I normally read a chapter of a book before I go to sleep. Well, when Eugenia did a post, that video would be my “end of the day” treat to watch before I went to sleep.

I can’t say enough good things about her – Eugenia is beyond wonderful and Adrienne and I feel blessed and privileged to be connected with her.

Want some FREE coaching on Vetting? Eugenia’s blog is a premiere source. She did a series on the subject, and if you’re smart, you’ll give a listen to what she has to say   here, here and here.   

Shucks, Eugenia’s entire blog constitutes free coaching on a variety of subjects. Again, if you’re smart, you’ll run, not walk right on over to her blog and get you some, because the woman drops some serious wisdom.

Eugenia’s tagline is: “The best part is I’ve lived it so I know what I’m talking about.”

Indeed! Her knowledge and her passion shine through her words and her voice.

The podcast with Eugenia was so much fun; we plan to have her on the show regularly!

Listen to the episode and you’ll understand why. Woot Woot!

 

Want to be a guest on the podcast, or know someone who should? Send an email to Podcast@TheSwirlWorld.com. Be sure to “Like” The Swirl World on Facebook and subscribe to the podcast on iTunes.

Copyright © 2014  Michelle Matthews Calloway, ASwirlGirl™, The Swirl World™, The Swirl World Podcast™,  All rights reserved. Photos used with permission.

 

 

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Filed Under: Podcast, Special, Uncategorized Tagged With: Black, Black women, Black. White, blogger, blogging, coach, Coaching, dating, Eugenia Berg, interracial, interracial dating, interracial marriage, interracial relationships, love, Married Girl In A Single World, Married Girl in a Weird World, podcast, relationship coach, swirling, twins, vetting, vlogger, vlogging, white

Lorraine Spencer – “Interracial Blogger Pioneer”

June 11, 2014 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 1 Comment

Lorraine SpencerAdrienne and I hold the utmost respect and admiration for Lorraine Spencer, an interracial blogger and pioneer in the IR blogging space.

We think so highly of Lorraine that we wholeheartedly agreed that she would be given the honor of serving as the very first guest on our podcast.

We simply can’t say enough good things about her: Lorraine is a wife, mother, blogger, author and mentor.

She doesn’t brag on her connections or accomplishments, but she’s worked with the imitable IR blogging pioneer Evia Moore, publisher of  Black Female Interracial Marriage (considered one of the “Mother Ships” of Black women’s interracial blogs).

Lorraine has also worked with Karyn Langhone-Folan, best-selling author of “Don’t Bring Home A White Boy” fame.

Lorraine is the author of two children’s books:

The Spider In My Mommy’s Car!

and

I Like Polka Dots On My Pizza!

Lorraine also has a book for adults scheduled for release on June 17 entitled When Family Does You Wrong. 

Her Facebook page “Swirling and Marriage” has hundreds of fans, as does her Pinterest page.

For inspirational photos and stories of interracially married couples, read Lorraine’s blog at Swirling And Marriage.

For well-researched, informative and entertaining posts, read Lorraine’s blogs under the pen name “Swirl Queen” over at Beyond Black And White. You can also chat with her on Twitter @ForensicMommy.

Lorraine drops knowledge in our podcast with her. What an honor and privilege to have her as our first guest!

Podcast Episode 002: Lorraine Spencer – “Interracial Blogging Pioneer”

 

Copyright © 2014 Michelle Matthews Calloway, ASwirlGirl™, The Swirl World™, The Swirl World Podcast™, All rights reserved. Post contains affiliate links.

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Filed Under: Podcast, Special, Uncategorized Tagged With: Black, Black women, Black. White, dating, Evia Moore, I Like Polka Dots On My Pizza, interracial, interracial dating, interracial marriage, interracial relationships, interracial romance, Karyn Langhorne Folan, Lorraine Spencer, pioneer, podcast, swirl, swirling, Swirling and Interracial Marriage, The Spider In My Mommy's Car, white

How To Change Your Life – And End Up On a National Television Show!

May 20, 2014 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 3 Comments

keep-calm-and-marry-an-aussie-3

Good grief! We’ve been on pins and needles – sitting on this news for about a month now and biting our nails in anticipation of sharing it:

Guess what???

Our man Mike In Australia (Michael Miocevich) was on a national television show – talking about SWIRLING!!!

*Jumping up and down*

We were certainly excited that Mike – OUR Mike – received this national coverage and attention.

Seems the producer planned to do a show on Swirling In Australia (later entitled “Dating Race”). She conducted some online searches to find men in Australia who preferred Black women.

Well, we’ve been doing “Monday’s With Mike” for some months now, so guess who she found???

Yeppers!

Out of ALL the men in Australia, she found OUR Mike.

OUR. Mike!

Woot Woot!

One of the things we strive to do in The Swirl World is build relationships. We practice good blogging netiquette and we believe in crediting our sources, both here and on our Facebook page.

We don’t bash –preferring instead to uplift and support.

Particularly special to us is the fact that in some small way, we are making a difference and changing lives – one person at a time.

But enough of the self-congratulations. We’ll let Mike tell you about his experience.

This excerpt is Part 1 – we have more to come!

Mike says:

“So, about a month ago I get a message from Elise Potaka, producer for SBS TV Australia (one of two public national broadcasters, which is bigger than you might think here in Oz), to talk to her about interracial dating, my history of it, ideas and opinions, etc.

Not a problem, I thought; I am more than happy to help anyone who is interested.

Turns out they were looking to do a TV show about it, and got all kinds of information from me about the Swirling community and my life as a Swirler.

Then came the hard question: They wanted to fly me out to the show to be in the audience!

Now this is the part that shocked me. I’ve never been given any kind of opportunity like this before.

To be flown across the country and put up at a hotel and then be on a national TV show?

Unimaginable. So I was nervous. And very hesitant.

You see, for a lot of my life I’ve felt like an outsider – to friends, family, people I meet.

I often don’t feel comfortable around them. I was very much worried about how I might come across for the show.

But then I had to follow the logic of the situation.

I had been invited on because I have been making steps towards a better life. I had taken the chance when I first contacted The Swirl World via Facebook.

I’d done so again when they got me to do a bit of a write-up about myself. Then again when they had me do “Monday’s with Mike,” and again when encouraging me to start my own writing blog.

After that much love and encouragement, I couldn’t let them down.

I couldn’t let myself down.

So I took the chance. And I am so thankful I did! I now feel more comfortable about who I am in my life than I ever have. I stood up for who I am and what I believe – and I felt stronger for it.

I have a lot of big plans I want to make happen, and a lot of changes I want to make in my life before I get to where I want to be, Taking this step has brought a lot of that closer.

So if I have one piece of advice to offer it’s this – If you see an opportunity and you’re hesitant because you worry what others might think or say, don’t be.

Take the leap of faith and go for it, because the rewards in confidence and self-esteem will likely outweigh any physical things you get from it.

Each step you take in the right direction will open new doors and new opportunities. Trust in yourself and step through them. When you look back, you’ll be amazed at the difference it has made!

Cheers,

Mike

 

To watch the show (and gain an interesting perspective on interracial dating in Australia – plus some delicious accents) – click here.

Mike networked with some of the people on the show and we hope to have some future posts featuring the other guests.

Whew! We can’t wait to see what happens with Mike’s continuing metamorphosis.

Stay tuned for more!

MIKE M - THIS ONEGot a question for Michael Miocevich? Send it to us via inbox on The Swirl World’s Facebook page or by email to ASwirlGirl@TheSwirlWorld.com.

Follow Mike on Twitter @500and50 and read his blog at 500and50.com, or message him on his 500and50 Facebook page.

Copyright © 2014 Michelle Matthews Calloway, ASwirlGirl™, The Swirl World™, All rights reserved.

 

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Filed Under: Announcements, Mondays With Mike, Series, Special, Uncategorized Tagged With: Aussie, Australia, Black, Black women, Black. White, change, change your life, dating, Dating Race, Elise Potaka, Facebook, interracial, interracial dating, interracial marriage, interracial relationships, interracial romance, metamorphosis, Michael Miocevich, Mike, Mondays With Mike, netiquette, Relationships, SBS TV Australia, special, swirling

What KKK Can Teach Us About Love

May 5, 2014 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 2 Comments

No, we’re not talking about that KKK – we’re talking about Kyler and Katia Kline!

Kylar and Katia hiking on Cheyenne Mountain in Colorado

Kylar and Katia hiking on Cheyenne Mountain in Colorado

Despite the naysayers and despite the ugliness and ignorance surrounding a recent highly publicized, highly dysfunctional interracial “relationship” that has dominated the news, interracial relationships – devoid of the cray-cray – are thriving.

Black women are living well and more and more of them are enjoying their lives, thumbing their collective noses at the nonsense and the madness and demonstrating to the world what real love is all about.

These Black women are dating, marrying and building families. Many are married to men we call “warriors” – our military men who are on the front lines protecting our freedoms.

(And many of them are “warriors” themselves!)

This week we take a refreshing break from the dysfunction and the madness and bring you a wonderful couple who, despite the deployments that are the norm of military life, are happy and whole – loving each other and living life to the fullest.

Ladies and Gentlemen, meet Kyler and Katia Kline.

In most instances the wife fills out our interview questionnaire. But in the case of Kyler and Katia, Kyler wanted to be the one to share their very special story – and in so doing proclaim his love of Katia to the world!

Enjoy their beautiful pictures – and enjoy their love!

Where do you live?

We live in Clarksville, Tennessee, in the greatest nation in the world.

How long you have been together?

We have been together for four years, three of which we have been happily married.

What are the names and ages of your children and/or grandchildren?

We currently do not have any children, but have already picked out some names for when the time comes.

How/where did you meet?
We first meet in the 10th grade and became friends and stayed friends throughout the years.

She shared an apartment with a good friend of mine and while home on leave we started talking and spending time together, and with my irresistible charm and good looks we decided to keep talking long distance.

After 6 months we decided to make it serious, and 6 months after that she sacrificed her current life to marry and eventually come live with me in Colorado – something I will forever be grateful for.

What was your defining moment – that moment when you each knew you were in love?

Kylar and Katia Kline - RNIR 1

We were at her apartment watching a movie together and we started holding hands. It was at this time I finally knew I was falling in love with her.

Then, when I was deployed to Afghanistan she sang, “You Are My Sunshine” to me. It was at this time I KNEW I loved her.

Our coming home kiss when my unit arrived home from Afghanistan – our first kiss in a year!

Our coming home kiss when my unit arrived home from Afghanistan – our first kiss in a year!

How did you families and friends respond to the news of your relationship?

My sisters were worried for their little brother as always and provided me with advice, yet they loved Katia and were happy and supportive of us.

My father was supportive of our relationship, but on hearing news that we wanted to get married expressed strongly that we at the age of 21 were too young to get married. He was extremely upset after hearing that we did get married but later approved of it after hearing words of wisdom from my Step-Mom. He then even offered Katia a room at his house while I was deployed.

My biological mom was of a different side and became slightly prejudiced. She did not expect to have her son dating a beautiful young Black lady; furthermore upon hearing of our engagement she expressed she wanted white grandkids. This was deeply upsetting to us.

But after getting to know Katia she began to love her and they are now close loving friends as mother and daughter in law, and even call each other regularly. My Mom also can’t wait for the cutest mixed babies the world will have ever seen!

Katia and I before we got married. She is holding my niece Elizabeth.

Katia and I before we got married. She is holding my niece Elizabeth.

The majority of our friends were very happy and supportive, but some of my male friends had the suspicion that she may be a “Tag Chaser,” which is a person who wants to date a soldier for the benefits or nostalgia of it. Most people don’t realize how poorly soldiers get paid till they marry one. But after meeting her they realized she was a benevolent young lady who loved me for me, and were then supportive.

The Army’s birthday ball at Fort Carson

The Army’s birthday ball at Fort Carson

How did you handle it?

I followed my heart, and could not be happier that I did.

This is my favorite picture of Katia, which I kept on me at all times while deployed in Afghanistan

This is my favorite picture of Katia, which I kept on me at all times while deployed in Afghanistan

What do you like most about your mate?

Everything not to sound corny, but I love how kind and loving she is, her smile, how she can sometimes be a handful, that she’s out going and fun,  her body. And most of all that she chose to spend the rest of her life loving me.

This photo was our honeymoon night. Unfortunately we couldn't go on a real vacation because I was only home for two weeks and had to go back to Afghanistan.

This photo was our honeymoon night. Unfortunately we couldn’t go on a real vacation because I was only home for two weeks and had to go back to Afghanistan.

What advice would you give to others who are interested in dating/marrying interracially?

I don’t see races, I only see many Americans of different cultures all of which I love. Unfortunately not everyone in America feels this way, so be ready for constant glares and judgment from others in public. This more so happens to my wife when I’m with her we only get glares and looks, most likely because of my size I tend to be intimidating.

Kylar and Katia Kline - Home Ball

She has even been attacked on face book before, being called many names. But we still publicly display how proud we are to be together and to be in love with one another.  

Our first baseball game together at the Denver Colorado Rockies stadium. We found that baseball was to boring for us.

Our first baseball game together at the Denver Colorado Rockies stadium. We found that baseball was to boring for us.

Anything else you believe is pertinent or just want to add?

We love your page and what it stands for!

 

THIS, Ladies and Gentleman, is what love is supposed to be like: Pure, proud and real. Thanks to Kyler for the service he provides to our country and thanks to Katia for being the wind beneath his wings!

 Want to be profiled here on the blog and on our Facebook page? Contact us via inbox on Facebook or send an email to Profiles@TheSwirlWorld.com.

 Copyright © 2014 Michelle Matthews Calloway, ASwirlGirl™, The Swirl World™, Lafayette, LA. All rights reserved. Photos used with permission.

 

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Filed Under: BW/WM, Military Couples, OPEL, Uncategorized Tagged With: Afghanistan, Army. deployed, ball, Black, Black women, Black. White, dating, deployed, deployment, high school, interracial, interracial dating, interracial marriage, interracial relationships, interracial romance, Katia, Kiss, Kline, Kylar, life, love, Marriage, military, swirling, Tennessee

How Do You Mend A Broken Heart? The Love Story Of Brad And Jamaica Miller – The Conclusion

April 30, 2014 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 3 Comments

For the past two weeks we have shared Part 1 and Part 2 of the story of Jamaica and Brad Miller, a military couple currently stationed in Louisiana.

Jamaica poured out her heart and shared her story with us – the good, the bad and the ugly. Some of her story we deemed too intimate and too personal to share via this medium, yet we’re honored and humbled Jamaica trusted us with her story and felt comfortable enough to let us peek into her experiences.

Jamaica left no stone unturned and hopes her story serves as an inspiration to other women.

Jamaica and Brad Miller_Wedding photo 2

Jamaica’s story is one of blood, sweat and a bucket load of tears. In many ways Jamaica is – no, was – a classic representation of a woman who stays in an abusive, dead-end relationship for far too long – and to her own detriment.

Thankfully, Jamaica was able to file for divorce and not only make a new start, but find a true and lasting love. Sadly, many women who flee physical, mental and emotionally abusive relationships are not as fortunate: Almost 1-million domestic violence incidents are reported each year (and if this is the number of reported incidents, can you imagine what the number would be if all incidents were reported???) [Source]

On average, 3 women and 1 man are murdered by their partner each day.

Each. Day.

 Ponder that fact as you read the concluding installment of Jamaica Miller’s story:

I filed for divorce again and moved out to my sister’s house. June came and I saw on Facebook that Brad would be returning to the states. I thought he would return to Kentucky and wondered how I would handle it, but he was sent to Louisiana.

I was happy for him and glad that he was back from his deployment safe and sound. I watched him on Facebook and noticed how women paid him compliments and obviously tried to get to know him. I had to admit that jealousy and other feelings were taking over me.

I prayed, Lord what is happening to me? I kept my distance but I knew in my heart this time I clearly wanted more.

The divorce was in process. I had signed my papers and was just waiting on my ex to sign his. Months passed by and still nothing. After much begging and pleading, he finally signed.

I didn’t immediately run to Brad. I talked to him from time to time but I kept my feelings hidden. Months passed and I heard nothing other than he was just enjoying his leave.

I continued to see pictures of him living, dating and enjoying life. Feeling unhappy, I finally expressed to him that I didn’t like it. He reminded me we were just friends. I thought, Oh ok, Jamaica – that’s all you wanted from day one, right? For him to be a friend?

Jamaica and Brad Miller_Brad

I kept praying, and asked the Lord if Brad was the man for me. I prayed that if there was anything ungodly in him that God would remove it from him, if he was the man He had for me.

By this time me and Brad’s conversations had only been on Facebook. I wanted to hear his voice but wasn’t ready to express I wanted more.

So you know the info tab that’s on Facebook? Well, it had his phone number so I saved it to my phone. It took me two weeks to actually use it! LOL!

I took a deep breath and texted, “Hello friend it’s Jamaica. I’m so glad you made it back safe. Be good, don’t break hearts.”

He texted me back and said, “I wouldn’t if you’ll just be my girl already! Stop telling me no – there’s nothing stopping you now.”

I laughed and said, Ok. We conversed and sent messages and acknowledged we had feelings – and now that we’d said it, long distance was in our way now.

At the end of August I got a message from Brad saying, “I’m coming to see you. I can’t take it anymore.” I said, “You’re kidding, right?”

He said, “Nope!”

I was nervous, not knowing if he’d be the same man behind the messages and conversations. On August 31 he texted me and said, “I’m outside.”

I froze a good 10 minutes before making it to the door. I went outside to his truck and we hugged, our smiles big as ever. The first thing he said was, “Do you have a bag I can use for my shoes? I kinda just through them in my truck – I was just ready to get to you!”

I laughed and said sure. We headed to my sister’s house. All I remember is him holding my hand the whole ride telling me I’m beautiful. I felt like a princess.

Jamaica and Brad Miller_Evening Wear

I knew this was my sunshine after the storm!!!!

He could only stay four days and by October we knew we wanted our relationship to go further. He asked me to move to Louisiana. He continued to say there wasn’t much there, but that he’d make it worth it for his family.

On Jan 29th he asked me to marry him! I started planning a small wedding. On February 2 he got baptized. We got married on February 14!

Jamaica and Brad Miller_Wedding photo - License

We asked, What was your defining moment – that moment when you each knew you were in love?

Jamaica’s response: The defining moment I knew I was in love was our first kiss. It lasted forever with him just holding me tight!!

Brad’s response: My defining moment was making two back-to-back trips to see Jamaica. I would never travel to see a woman – but she was worth it!

How did you families and friends respond to the news of your relationship? How did you handle it?

I’ve attached a picture of  a text message showing his Mom and Dad’s responses:Jamaica and Brad Miller - Parents Test Message

After we got married, Brad called his aunt. They all congratulated us.

When Brad came to town to see me that first time, we went to my sister’s house. My nieces and nephew ran to the door to meet him. My oldest sister just kept giving me that look and whispered, “He’s the one – keep him!” Lol! For my sister to say that, I knew I was on the right path.

Later my little sister came in town from Lexington.  We sat up and chatted for a while. She said, “I can tell you like him. I know he’s the one so take your time and I can’t wait to be in your wedding!” LOL

My Mom and Dad gave their seal of approval and welcomed Brad to the family. They asked him if his parents were ok with him dating outside his race  and he replied, “Yes – from the time I was born!” LOL

What do you like most about your mate?

Jamaica’s response: What I like most about my husband is his drive to go above and beyond for his family. Our daughter wanted to change the color of her dresser and put her new initial “M” on it – and he did just that.

Jamaica and Brad Miller_Selfie with Daughter

Brad’s response: What I like most about my wife is that she loves me no matter the trail of clothes I leave from the shower to the closet after pt! At first she fussed but now I just leave a note saying, Sorry, Hun I had to rush back to work to bring home the bacon. I LOVE YOU !!!

What advice would you give to others who are interested in dating/marrying interracially?

Our advice would be, Go for it! Love comes in all shades. Don’t be afraid and don’t worry about the dirty looks you get. The only thing that matters is the love you have for each other and how happy you are.

Most important don’t try to change each other, but enjoy the things that make you different. For the first time ever, I rode a horse for my husband. I was scared out my mind at first but I had fun! LOL

Jamaica and Brad Miller_Swim

For us, we know God doesn’t make mistakes. Make God the center In all you do!!!

So that’s us, the Millers. I hope our story touches others’ hearts, knowing that anything is possible!!!

If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, call the National Domestic HOTLINE at 1-800-799-7233 | 1-800-787-3224 (TTY) or visit TheHotline.org.

 Want to be profiled here on the blog and on our Facebook page? Contact us via inbox on Facebook or send an email to Profiles@TheSwirlWorld.com.

 Copyright © 2013 Michelle Matthews Calloway, ASwirlGirl™, The Swirl World™, All rights reserved. Photos used with permission.

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Filed Under: BW/WM, OPEL, Series, Special, Uncategorized Tagged With: Black, Black women, Black. White, Brad, conversations, Facebook, interracial, interracial dating, interracial marriage, interracial relationships, interracial romance, Jamaica, Kentucky, leave, long distance, long distance relationship, long distance romance, Louisiana, love, Marriage, military, Miller, proposal, swirl, swirling, testing, text messages, texted, wedding, white

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I’m Michelle Matthews-Calloway, and I’m A Swirl Girl! Greetings to you from The Swirl World. We encourage Black women to expand their relationship options by dating and marrying interracially. Our overarching mission is to see Black Women live their best life. Come Swirl with us in The Swirl World™, where we celebrate Black women and the diverse men who love us!™

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