dating Archives - Page 10 of 14

Party Over Here!

June 15, 2013 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 2 Comments

This is family reunion weekend on my Dad’s side. In between doing work on the dissertation and doing mental push ups in Firepole’s Business Ignition Bootcamp, I’m partying like a rock star and enjoying my family.

My Mother’s side of the family is very quiet and very conservative. My Dad’s side is the exact opposite – very loud and very liberal. We even have a couple of BM/WW Swirl couples on that side. Woot! Woot!

I truly have the best of both worlds, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Join in the Fray: What are you doing this weekend?

I’m In Boot Camp!

June 7, 2013 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway Leave a Comment

I’m very proud to say that out of thousands of applicants, I was selected as one of 200 persons to enlist in the first ever Business Ignition Boot Camp from marketing whiz Danny Iny of Firepole Marketing.

The Boot Camp is a six-week designed to help entrepreneurs move into the place where they can use their businesses to further their desire to make a difference in the world. An added perk? The Boot Camp is free!

I’m excited to work with 200 talented and creative people, many of whom have already reached out to learn more about Swirling. (Can’t wait to find out how many Swirlers are in the camp)!

On another note, last week’s post generated a lot of buzz so my inbox was flooded with Swirlers reaching out to me to submit guest posts. Stay tuned for more book reviews and primers on how to date men of varying ethnicities. Married Swirlers will also chime in with their stories.

I also started a vegetarian diet (in 7-day intervals) so I’ll keep you posted on my progress. (And if you have some good recipes, please share them)!

I’m excited about the great things that are happening, and the cool direction the blog is taking. I have every confidence that I’ll come away from the Boot Camp with a new business model, fully energized to give you the best A Swirl Girl has to offer.

Thanks so much for your continued support – please know that it means much to me. Woot Woot!

Join in the Fray: What’s going on in your world?

It’s An Opportunity – Not A Problem!

May 16, 2013 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 1 Comment

If you’re like me, sometimes you need to conduct a mental reset.

You’re hit with a ~~problem~~ opportunity, and you need to know how to handle it.

Today I’m pleased to present a guest post from Bill Treasurer, a national thought leader on change management. Bill just released a new book entitled Leaders Open Doors. I had the pleasure of reviewing an advance copy, and I can personally attest that it’s a good read.

(And if that’s not enough, let me add that 100% of the proceeds will be donated to charities that serve children with special needs)!

In this post, Bill discusses the best way to have a mental reset when a “problem” comes up: View that “problem” as an opportunity.

(This mindset serves me well as I go through the process of re-editing my dissertation)!

Here’s Bill’s take:

“It sounds like something that you’d see on one of those sappy motivational posters: There are no problems, only opportunities.

There’s no denying that challenging situations exist, and that sometimes they turn into emergencies. But there’s a good point to be made about how we perceive those situations, how we define them and respond to them. And it has everything to do with how we lead.

Problems, by their very nature, are something to be avoided – who would knowingly court a problem? But the problem-avoidance mindset, with a focus on potential threats, is…well, problematic. Evaluating every situation from that frame of mind is reactive, giving priority to mitigating risk. It leads to cautious planning and timid leadership. It creates an atmosphere of pessimism by injecting fear and anxiety into people. It damages morale and performance.

Our leadership and business culture is dominated by an unhealthy emphasis on problem-solving. We teach classes in it, we train teams to address it, we value it in employees. We embrace it as a value.

It’s time to move to a model of opportunity.

An opportunity mindset shifts everything. It frees leadership to focus on positive outcomes, to take chances, to embrace possibility. Instead of building a climate of fear, it inspires people with excitement and hope.

And for leaders, it sets up a structure where you don’t just show people how to solve problems but give them chances to grow, to embrace risk, to make the most of opportunities – even the ones that look like problems to most people.

If you want to open doors for people, an opportunity mindset is an essential first step. It may seem unnatural at first, but pay attention to how you perceive events and keep your focus on opportunities rather than problems.

Take to heart the words of Johnny Mercer:

‘You’ve got to accentuate the positive

Eliminate the negative

Latch on to the affirmative

Don’t mess with Mister In-Between'”

Bill Treasurer is the Chief Encouragement Officer of Giant Leap Consulting. His latest book is Leaders Open Doors (www.leadersopendoors.com). Bill is also the author of the bestselling book Courage Goes to Work along with the training kit Courageous Leadership: A Program for Using Courage to Transform the Workplace. Bill has led courage-building workshops for such organizations as NASA, Accenture, CNN, PNC Bank, SPANX, Hugo Boss, Saks Fifth Avenue, and the US Department of Veterans Affairs. Contact Bill at btreasurer@giantleapconsulting.com, or on Twitter at @btreasurer (#leadsimple).

Join in the Fray: What current “problem” can you turn into an opportunity?

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Swirling With Latin Men: What to Expect

May 3, 2013 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 26 Comments

I’ve received some queries in the inbox concerning Swirling with Latin men.

Shucks, I wanna know more about that myself!

Guest blogger Miranda Santiago gives us the inside scoop:

Oh yes. You’ve seen them on TV or in the movies or on stage. Latinos!

Who can blame you for being love struck? With their perfect complexion, dark hair and irresistible accent no woman in her right mind would want to pass on such a man. Besides, you’ve heard they are very family oriented and hold to strong traditional values.

Well, before you race off to corral one of your own, let this Latina fill you in on what to expect.

Latinos come from a culture that places a lot of emphasis on the man taking the lead in a relationship where the woman is dependent on him. This is not always the case but it is the culturally handed down norm. Let me fill you in on some of the specifics.

What frightens them

Latinos are often intimidated by successful women. The men feel they must be the breadwinner. It is a cultural expectation, a generations old custom instilled in boys from a young age. All of their traditional role models are of men that make the money and of women that stay home and cook the dinner.

If you are a successful woman who has the earning power to take care of yourself, watch out. Your Latino beau may at first seem indifferent to your earning power, but later in the relationship it may become an issue. However, thankfully in this country that stereotype is being broken down one successful woman at a time.

This is not to say that all Latin men are machistas. That is, not all of them buy into the custom of being tough and in control. However, masculinity is important to them. But thankfully, as time passes men are becoming less bound to those old expectations.

What they like

Before you take the initiative and make the first move – Stop. That Latin eye candy you’re fixating on will prefer being the one to make the first move. However, don’t let that stop you from dropping those flirtatious signals.

Very likely, your Latino man grew up with women who were very supportive of him, sometimes passionately so. He will expect the same from you. When he talks to you about something in his life, he expects your support and not necessarily your advice.

He will like someone who reminds him of his mother. Being family oriented on your part is a big plus. If you want this relationship to move to the next level, you should want children, because he will.

Family matters

That Latino man you have your eye on was likely raised in a large extended family where he has plenty of female relatives which he will compare you too. Family is very important, so if you are dating a Latino man expect to be around his family as well. His relationship with his mother is very close. It would be to your advantage to get on her good side. But also remember that he will very likely compare you to his mother.

Latinas are very supportive of their sons and brothers; so cultivating a close relationship with the women in the family is important. You can expect to spend a lot of family time together.

There you go. This is what you can expect from dating a Latino. Enjoy!

Miranda Santiago has a degree in Psychology from Boston College and is now a freelance writer who covers dating topics, specifically Latin dating. Apart from writing, Miranda enjoys windsurfing, playing the piano and cheering on her favorite baseball teams.

Join in the Fray: Latin men: Hot, or not?

My BIG, HUGE Announcement: I Have A New Baby-And It’s A Girl!!!!

April 30, 2013 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 11 Comments

Remember back on April 1st when I told you that I would have a special announcement to make at the end of the month?

Well, my BIG, HUGE announcement is:

I Have A New Baby-And It’s A Girl!!!!

*Beaming with pride*

Just kidding. Sort of.

(I am shrieking with laughter, because even when I’m totally serious, I play too much).

I don’t have THAT kind of new baby!

No, I have THIS kind:

You’re looking at the brand new face of my upcoming blog and website:

For Church Girls

Traditional . . . .Yet Contemporary Women

That’s right, I’m launching a new blog designed specifically for women of faith. The Proverbs 31 woman in the Old Testament and the businesswoman Lydia of the New Testament serve as the inspirations for the blog. Both were traditional women in that they were women of faith – yet they were contemporary for their time.

The purpose of For Church Girls is to serve as the go-to blog for women of faith. The blog will focus on spiritual things including inspiration, empowerment, and personal enrichment, as well as natural things that are also of interest and concern, including health, wellness, hair, fashion, and beauty. Moving forward, we will also hold monthly empowerment calls featuring guests who will lead discussions on a variety of topics.

This has been a particularly exciting week for me, not just because I’m undertaking this new venture, but because other bloggers like Christelyn Karazin of Beyond Black & White are forming networks and coalitions, and launching new websites.

This is a win-win situation for women seeking quality content.

I recently completed a Blogging School conducted by Rosetta Thurman, Blog Mistress of the Happy Black Woman. The class was filled with women who are starting new blogs and launching websites.

Writer and social commentator Angela Gatlin Keys is working on a new website. Celebrity stylist Kaye Flewellen of Just Ask Kaye is working on a new book and companion website, as is blogger Toni M, Blog Mistress of Petals.

Just this Monday, blogger LC Coleman of Colored Girl Confidential launched a new online networking and accountability group called The Colored Water Fountain.

And as for A Swirl Girl? Well, she’s going to Keep Calm And Swirl On!

No worries; this blog will continue. I’ve got more good stuff coming up, including a special guest post from dating advice specialist and freelance writer Miranda Santiago, who will share some juicy tidbits about interracial dating and Latin men. Look for more profiles of interracial romance writers, and stories and photos from interracial couples.

And, of course, news and updates regarding my Swirling activity.

Back to the matter at hand:

Isn’t it wonderful that bloggers and writers are pursuing and fulfilling their dreams? And that’s the beauty of dreams: Everyone can have a dream, a goal, a vision – and everyone can realize their dreams.

The vision I foresee in For Church Girls is a website that serves as a safe haven for women of faith. Far too often these days, “Church Girls” are portrayed in a negative light, and viewed as thirsty, man hungry, gullible hypocrites who are silly and vapid. Yes, the Bible aptly describes such women; they do exist. Their egregious behavior needs to be challenged! Even though For Church Girls will project a nurturing environment, we won’t coddle anybody: Stinkin’ thinkin’ and behavior will be called out and addressed!

Our launch is set for May 11, 2013.

Till then, head on over and sign up for our updates to ensure you don’t miss a bit of the action!

Join in the Fray: What’s your opinion of modern-day “Church Girls?”

I have blogged every day in the month of April for BlogHer’s NaBloPoMo Challenge. Thanks for reading and do leave a comment!

Something I Need To Remember . . . .

April 26, 2013 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 4 Comments

. . . . when I start working on the edits for my dissertation:

Join in the Fray: What’s your current favorite quote – and why?

I’m blogging every day in the month of April in Blogher’s NaBloPoMo Challenge. Thanks for reading, and feel free to comment!

Just Had To Share This . . . .

April 25, 2013 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 4 Comments

Saw this on a friend’s Facebook page and just had to share:

Join in the Fray: I’m not only in the process, I’m seeing results. How about you?

I’m blogging every day in the month of April in Blogher’s NaBloPoMo Challenge. Thanks for reading, and feel free to comment!

~Le Sigh (A HUGE One)

April 21, 2013 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 10 Comments

I received an email from my Dissertation Chair. She heard back from the Quality Reviewers concerning my dissertation.

This is the news she forwarded to me:

Overall, Michelle has produced a very interesting and important study. However, there are issues that need to be addressed prior to approving this dissertation. The main concern with this study is the reporting of the findings. Below, examples are provided to guide Michelle in her revisions. These examples should be considered illustrative, not exhaustive.

*Faints*

Gets back up.

*Faints*

Gets back up. Drinks some Coke Zero.

Reviews the list. Recognizes that the glass is always half full; never half empty.

I can do this. I am doing it.

Join in the Fray: What’s making you say “Le Sigh?”

I’m blogging every day in the month of April in Blogher’s NaBloPoMo Challenge. Thanks for reading, and feel free to comment!

Pink Party Over Here!

April 20, 2013 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway 2 Comments

A couple of years ago my major home base shifted from Texas to Louisiana. I have to say, one of the great things about Southwest Louisiana (besides the food) is the fact that you can pretty much always find a Festival or a party on any given weekend.

Last Saturday night I had the pleasure of attending a “VIPink Party” given by the Lafayette chapter of the Susan G. Komen Foundation to raise money and honor breast cancer survivors. The blinged out pink affair was held at the Cypress Bayou Casino & Hotel in Charenton, LA (another thing about SW LA is that things aren’t pronounced the way they are spelled. “Charenton” is pronounced “Cher-ruh-ton” – and make sure you say it really fast!)

I’d heard quite a bit about the Casino but hadn’t had the opportunity to visit. We had to walk through the Casino to get to the banquet room ~~which meant I had to walk past the mindless Zombies seated at the slot machines and the fanatics at the crap table~~.

The sights and sounds were awesome! Here are some highlights:

We walked in on the “Pink Carpet”

The table decorations were gorgeous:

Pink, pink everywhere . . . .

Dinner was a fabulous buffet, complete with pink butter for our panini-grilled bread:

and dessert was . . . well . . . pink:

(Yes, not only is that a pink Rice Krispy Treat, that’s a pink praline over on the right. Yes. Exactly.)

After dinner comes dancing. We were treated to old school jams from the band Krossfyre:

Everybody loves old school jams . . . (even when they get off step):

And what’s a Southwest Louisiana party without some good rockin’ Zydeco?

See the rub-board he’s wearing? My Grandmother used to play one, only hers wasn’t nearly so fancy. It wasn’t a “body” one, either – just the good, old-fashioned scrubbing board (some people call it a wash board) framed in wood.

She held it up to her chin in the crook of her arm like it was a fiddle. The “pick” she used to play it? Visualize a wire clothes hanger. Fold the long sides in half. See the hook at the top? That’s the part she “scratched” with!

All in all, it was a wonderful night and I had a great time. I was happy to participate in such a worthy cause, and look forward to more of the same.

Next up: Festival International de Louisiane kicks off this week, April 24-28! ! Woot Woot!

Join in the Fray: What’s your thing: A Festival , Carnival, or Amusement Park?

I’m blogging every day in the month of April in Blogher’s NaBloPoMo Challenge. Thanks for reading, and feel free to comment!

The Purpose of a Problem

April 18, 2013 By Michelle Matthews-Calloway Leave a Comment

I’m so glad I reached the point of maturity that I can now recognize the gifts!

Join in the Fray: When has one of your problems turned into a gift?

I’m blogging every day in the month of April for BlogHer’s NaBloPoMo Challenge. Thanks for reading and do leave a comment!

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Party Over Here!

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I’m In Boot Camp!

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It’s An Opportunity – Not A Problem!

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Swirling With Latin Men: What to Expect

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My BIG, HUGE Announcement: I Have A New Baby-And It’s A Girl!!!!

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Something I Need To Remember . . . .

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Just Had To Share This . . . .

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~Le Sigh (A HUGE One)

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Pink Party Over Here!

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The Purpose of a Problem

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