I came apart inside a world
Made of angry people
I found a boy who had a dream
Making everyone smile
He was sunshine
I fell over
My feet like bricks under water
And how am I supposed to tell you how I feel?
I need oxygen
Oh baby, if I was your lady
I will make you happy
I’m never gonna leave, never gonna leave
Oh baby, I would be your lady
I am going crazy…for you
And so I found a state of mind
Where I could be speechless
I had to try it for a while
To figure out this feeling
This felt so right
Pull me upside
Down to a place where you’ve been waiting
And how am I supposed to tell you how I feel?
I need oxygen
Oh baby, if I was your lady
I will make you happy
I’m never gonna leave, never gonna leave
Oh baby, I would be your lady
I am going crazy…for you
~Partial lyrics to Oxygen by Colbie Caillat & Jason Reeves
It was starting to get a tad bit late; more so for SM than me because of our one-hour time zone difference. All the conversations, e-mails, instant messages, and texts had come to a head, and we both sensed it.
SM, in his characteristically logical and sensible way, cut to the chase.
Him: “I’m really enjoying our friendship and I want to take it to a more serious level. Do you feel the same way?”
I’m not one to play games, so I met him head on.
Me: “Yes, I do.”
Him: “I know you’ve never dated a White guy, and I’ve never dated a Black woman before. We’ve talked about it, but now we need to decide if we want to move forward and take that step. Are you ready?”
It was time to put up or shut up.
Me: “I sure am!”
SM: “Well, how bout we just take a leap of faith, jump into the unknown, and see where we land?”
Me: “On the count of three . . . . “
SM & Me: “One . . . two . . . three . . . .”
JUMP!
We didn’t just jump: We dove in.
We dove in feet first; with the abandon of children.
We jumped into a pool of uncertainty, determined to swim instead of sink. We believed our diverse backgrounds and open minds gave us an edge; how hard could it be? Knowing what we wanted helped and we believed we had found the one. Differences in skin color, race, ethnicity, and culture notwithstanding, we know what really mattered was the person underneath. We shared similar principles and values – and loved each other’s quirky sense of humor. We believed that life isn’t about the destination, it’s more about the journey – and we knew we wanted to travel through life together. We didn’t plan to face life head on; instead, life was going to face us.
Yesterday we celebrated the two-year anniversary of that fateful conversation. Since then, we’ve laughed, we’ve cried, we’ve fought, negotiated, compromised, and made up. We’ve made each other almost as mad as we’ve ever been, and happier than we ever thought possible. We’ve navigated the dynamics associated with the meet and greets of family and friends, and braved (and returned) the stares whenever and wherever we encountered them. We’ve fielded questions (whether they made sense or not), and tried to be gracious when we received unsolicited advice (and believe you me, advice of the unsolicited variety abounds). We keep learning about ourselves, about life and people, and above all, each other.
He colors my world, and I color his. May our jump day never end!
As time goes on
I realize
Just what you mean
To me
And now
Now that you’re near
Promise your love
That I’ve waited to share
And dreams
Of our moments together
Color my world with hope of loving you
~Lyrics to Color My World by Chicago, written by James Pankow
Join in the fray:
What pool have you “jumped” into?
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