My Mother purchased this eraser for me earlier this year when I was working on dissertation edits.
Needless to say, I needed this eraser – and used it often.
The writing on the eraser proudly proclaims: “For BIG Mistakes.” I thought about those words, what an eraser does, and wished the Dollar General made one that could be used on life’s big mistakes.
Have you ever done something you wished you could erase?
Made a decision to go right – when you should have gone left?
Said “Yes” when you should have said, “No?”
Walked away when you should have stayed?
Stayed when you should have walked away?
Unfortunately, neither life nor the Dollar General comes with an eraser For Life’s BIG Mistakes. We have always been told that we should learn from our mistakes, and that’s certainly true enough. Yet, mistakes don’t have to be self-made for us to learn from them; shucks, we can look at the mistakes of others and take a lesson if we choose to pay attention.
I also believe we learn the cure for a BIG mistake when we start over. We take the eraser and start swiping. The relief and the release come when we erase.
How do we erase? We erase when we let go; choose to forgive ourselves if the mistake was ours, or forgive someone if the mistake was theirs.
Erase; erase.
We erase when we decide to accept the concept of imperfection: Screw ups, blunders, lapses in judgment, missteps and major disasters. Yes; those imperfections can happen to us – and they can certainly happen to others. (You know – those people who do/did us wrong).
Erase, erase, erase.
We demonstrate that we have learned the cure for BIG mistakes when we dust off, regroup, recover and keep moving forward. Sadder? Maybe. Wiser? Definitely!
We move forward; on and up to the next step. We physically and emotionally put one foot in front of the other and keep going.
We soon discover not only have we progressed; we’ve grown and matured.
Ultimately, we see that we are better for the mistake.
And that’s when we know the cure is complete.
Join in the Fray: When have you had to use a BIG eraser?
Copyright © 2013 Michelle Matthews Calloway, ASwirlGirl™, The Swirl World™, All rights reserved.
TheSwirlWorld says
Shashi,
I’m with you – I always want to move forward. I keep reminding myself that my life is AHEAD of me.
Thanks for stopping by!
TheSwirlWorld says
Karen,
Teaching others and helping them learn from our mistakes are things that can help to make mistakes a positive force. Thanks for being an example to others.
TheSwirlWorld says
Zan,
You’re welcome! Thanks for stopping by.
TheSwirlWorld says
Tiffany,
Thanks so much for being so transparent and sharing your experience. I’m sorry you had to go through that. You’re so right; we never know how strong we are until we have no choice. One of the things I’m amazed by is how resilient the experiences of life make you become. Something I also think about is, “I made it through x y z; I can make it through THIS!” All the best to you as you move forward in life. May you find a man who will love you and your child and appreciate you for who you are.
TheSwirlWorld says
Ellie,
Thanks so much! It’s certainly a milestone in my life. I love the saying you shared. I do my best to try to view each day as a gift. Thanks for stopping by!
TheSwirlWorld says
Charlotte,
I like the way you said “reshape them into better decisions.” What a great way to “make lemonade” from the “lemons” of mistakes! Thanks for sharing that thought.
TheSwirlWorld says
Tess,
He does, indeed! Thanks for stopping by.
TheSwirlWorld says
Natasha,
Thanks for stopping by – and thanks for sharing!
TheSwirlWorld says
Liz,
Thanks for sharing such a positive perspective! I appreciate the term “life lessons.” I’m going to use that from now on! 🙂
TheSwirlWorld says
Daou,
I agree. We are composed of the sum of our experiences. The goal is to learn from the lesson and hopefully become better (and wiser!). Thanks for stopping by. 🙂
TheSwirlWorld says
True!
TheSwirlWorld says
Tatiana,
Great points! I certainly believe we are the sum of our experiences – good and bad. Our lives become better (or worse) as a result of what we do with those experiences. Thanks for stopping by!
TheSwirlWorld says
Lori,
So true! He is the Master at erasing and making things (and people) NEW!
TheSwirlWorld says
Hi Rhonda,
Ahhh . . . the “Do Over!” Yes! LOl! You’re right; the next best thing is to not repeat the mistake once it occurs. Thanks for stopping by.
TheSwirlWorld says
April,
Thanks for stopping by. How wonderful you’re able to learn and grow as a result of seeing things in yourself that you don’t like. I shudder when I come across people who don’t seem to care! All the best to you and your husband.
TheSwirlWorld says
Cindy b,
Thank you! I wish I knew why it’s so hard to let go of some things. I believe some of it has to do with just accepting the fact that we made a mistake, and then allowing ourself to move on. Thanks for stopping by!
TheSwirlWorld says
Kristin,
Thanks so much for stopping by. You’re right – time does help us to mature – and it often takes away the sting, too.
Lori says
Forgiveness is such a big part of this, and it always seems hardest to forgive yourself. The best part is asking God for His forgiveness and letting Him change you from the inside out. He can then truly paint your life into a masterpiece that makes all the flaws beautiful!
Zan says
Sometimes you so wish you could just take them back – the mistakes, I mean. But what is done is done….so thank you for using the “eraser” analogy to bring this post to light.
Karen says
You made some really great points! I have learned a lot from my past mistakes. I am hoping that I am teaching others by my mistakes so they do not have to make the same ones.
Stacy @ Flights of Delight says
Every “mistake” is a learning opportunity, so I wouldn’t erase any of them. I have learned from them and become better because of them. To erase or forget mistakes is to deny they ever happened and refuse to learn and improve from them. So, I like my marred, marked up, struck-through, edited past. Thanks for the thoughtful post!
Terra says
From experience I know making mistakes is important. Not always fun, but important. It’s how I leanr to improve and change. I need one of those giant erasers to remind me of that!
Val says
Recognizing the mistakes is such a huge step. Without recognizing it, you can’t change.
Carli says
I have a hard time with regrets. Because I have moments where I just love my life and I know I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for my mistakes. I accept my humanity and all the negatives that come with it. Doesn’t mean in the moment I don’t wish for that big eraser, but when I’m out of the woods, I am thankful my life took that turn. Thank you for this!
Raj @Pink Chai Style says
What a lovely post. There are huge periods of my life that I wish I could erase – in particular one decision that turned my life upside down 3 years ago…I’ve wished, prayed, dreamed, and cried about going back and erasing it. However, it took 2 years of healing to realize that without that fatal “mistake” I wouldn’t be where I am today, and I love this place. I think sometimes we have to make those mistakes to find our true path in life.
Looking forward to reading more from you!
Tiffany says
I can totally relate to this. I am a single mom that was in an emotionally and physically abusive relationship. The one thing I wish that I could change was not going back to my ex when I found out I was pregnant. I felt like if I had just been a single mom from the beginning I would have been better off. But I realize that going through the difficulties I went through in that relationship and after he left us forced me to become stronger and more independent. I like to say that you never know how strong you are until being strong is your only option.
ellie @ creative geekery blog says
First of all, congratulations on working on and/or completing a dissertation! SO awesome! Thank you for this reminder to be kind to ourselves. I love to remind my kids, “Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift, that is what it is called the present.” XO
Charlotte Anne says
I’ll definitely buy that eraser. A very big one!!! If ever there is one. I learned from my mistakes a lot and try to reshape them to a better decisions.
Tess says
A deep post. i too need a big eraser for many mistakes! But, i guess god lets us learn from our mistakes.
Shashi says
When I was younger, I would have said – forget the eraser – I wish I had an “undo” button or “command prompt delete” but as I have gotten older, my motto has been more “live and learn and always move forward”.
Enjoyed reading your post 🙂
Natasha says
I definitely could have used that eraser in my 20’s! Made mistake upon mistake! But I finally woke up, left a bad situation and stopped letting other people make decisions for me. I can’t erase my past, but I can accept that I did what I did — and I don’t have to do that anymore.
Thanks for your post!
A Swirl Girl says
Nickida, I’m with you! Those are some of the best ways to use and benefit from mistakes. Thanks so much for stopping by.
A Swirl Girl says
Felicia,
How wonderful! I try to live my life with no regrets, and I am able to do that when I reconcile the events I wish I could erase. They happened, and the important thing is for me to accept it, learn the lesson and move on. I’m with you – I’m loving my life! The mistakes of the past help me to enjoy the present even more because I’m a better and more enriched person. Thanks for sharing!
A Swirl Girl says
Hi Chrystal,
Thanks so much for sharing and being transparent about where you are in your life. I pray that the path you are on is the right one for you and that the way will be made more plain as you progress forward. Your future is certainly AHEAD of you, and as the saying goes, Today is the first day of the rest of your life. I pray you Godspeed.
A Swirl Girl says
Kimberly, that’s a great way to look at the things we wish we could erase – if they never occurred, we would not be who we are. To me, that also ties in to making lemonade when we wind up with lemons. Thanks so much for stopping by!
Liz says
This is true, but for me I try not to look at them as mistakes. The things others see as “mistakes” are what I see as “life lessons”, because they are. And not everyone learns the same life lessons at the same time. I think that’s what makes them so great.
Daou H. says
I think everyone in their life have felt that they wish they can just erase the big mistakes that we made. But what I learned is that at the end of the day, it makes me who I am today. Erasing those mistakes means that I would have to erased the lessons I learned from it. After a while, we just have to pick ourselves up by our boot strap and move on. Can’t let those big mistakes hold us back after all. Great post!
Pam says
I truly believe life is full of mistakes….if we didnt make mistakes we would never learn from them and move forward.
Tatiana says
Yes, there have been many many times I wish I could have erased things I have done. Would my life have been the same? Better? Worse if I had? Have those mistakes made me who I am today? Probably. Even still, there are still definitely some things I’d rather have erased 😉
Rhonda says
What a great post! There are a number of interactions I wish I could get a do-over on… I wish I could go back & un- say some things. But instead, I have to try not to repeat mistakes- and I guess that has to be good enough.
April S says
What a thoughtful post! I have certainly longed for a BIG eraser many times in my life. Especially since being married! I believe marriage has revealed to me how insensitive and self-centered I truly am. When I’ve said something hurtful, or disrespectful, to my husband, and I see the damage I’ve done to him, and our marriage, it’s ridiculously humbling. I’m learning, although very slowly, how to care for others (not just my husband), and put their needs above my own. I won’t ever be perfect, but I do hope to grow in this over my lifetime. Thanks for your post!
cindy b says
Thanks for this inspiring post! I don’t know why but I have such a hard time moving on from a mistake. I tend to dwell on it over and over! Thank you so much for sharing these wonderful tips!
Kristin @ Keenly Kristin says
Ugh! There certainly have been plenty of times when I could have used a big life eraser. Of course, that feeling is always strongest when you’re still “in the moment,” and you think you’ll never recover or be able to move on from the situation. However, as time goes on and we become more responsible and mature — and we learn that our mistakes have become part of our character, and have made us who we are. So, as much as I hated those mistakes (and some I still do…), I wouldn’t be me without that experience.
So, long story short, yes, I agree with you. 🙂
Nickida says
At first I would say that yes I wish I could erase mistakes but some I have learned from. Of course there are one or two things I wish I had never done but I plan to use them as a teaching tool and a reminder of why I shouldn’t make those mistakes again. Great post.
A Swirl Girl says
Bintu, thanks for your comments. I sometimes wonder why it’s so hard to forgive ourselves. I believe if we found it easier to admit that we’re human – we come equipped with flaws – that would make it easier. You’re right; as we get older it does get easier – maybe because we’ve made so many and we’re better at it by then? 🙂 More than likely maturity helps makes us better at acceptance. Thanks again!
A Swirl Girl says
Anil, so true! We can glean the beauty of a mistake when we use it as a stepping stone instead of wallowing in our failure. Thanks for stopping by!
A Swirl Girl says
Jenn,
Thanks for your comments. I’m happy for the “little” mistakes that leave no lasting damage. I believe that sometimes when we know better and decide to make the wrong choice, we call it a “mistake” when in reality, if we’re honest, we simply made a bad choice. Your perspective is interesting; I’ll certainly give it some thought. Thanks again!
Felicia says
I am unsure if i would erase any big mistakes from my past because to do so would change were my life is today and I am loving my life!
I do agree though that each mistake, huge, big or small can teach us something and we when pick ourselves back up and try again failing because harder and succeeding becomes easier.
Chrystal says
The last 5 years of my life I have felt I needed to erase. I have questioned many choices I have made and still continue to wonder whether the path I am on is the right one. I am trying to change the way I think about things because there is no eraser big enough to erase the past. We must learn from our past and continue on with our future. Our future is only what we make of it.
A Swirl Girl says
Brandy,
You bring up some excellent points concerning the mistakes we make in the way we treat other people. All too often we focus on how people treat US, yet how do we treat OTHERS? I try to keep the Golden Rule always in mind and I’m not always successful. Thanks for the reminder!
A Swirl Girl says
Tiffany, that’s ok! I just responded to you. 🙂
A Swirl Girl says
April,
Thanks for stopping by and commenting! I can certainly think of a few that I would like to erase, yet I can’t. I console myself by doing my best to not repeat them!
Kimberly Turner says
Oh boy, it’s like the big question… if you could go back and change something…. I do think of a few instances that I might consider, but then change my mind because I believe that all things happen for a reason…. and in a chain of events, causes the following events in your life. What is it called, the butterfly effect? The one big mistake in my life that I maybe would have changed, definitely would not have lead me to where I am today had it been erased and rewritten. We learn from our mistakes, and (hopefully) make adjustments from that.
Bintu @ Recipes From A Pantry says
Sometimes it is soooo hard to forgive yourself for mistakes even the little ones but as I get older I get quicker at it. If only I can magic up a big eraser of my own. Thanks for sharing your story.
Anil Anvesh says
Failures are stepping stones to success 🙂
Jenn Alex Brockman says
I had to chuckle because I was thinking early in the post that you can LEARN from the mistake and they often make you who you are – hopefully that’s a better person, or at least smarter. Then toward the end, you said the same thing. I make mistakes every day. Some of them are no big deal, and they are more of an experiment than a mistake.
I think mistakes might be better defined as knowing better, but making the bad choice, rather than making a choice without information or knowing any better.
Tiffany says
Oops! I posted with Facebook, please see above. Sorry!
brandy says
Oh wow, there are too many situations to count! Too many times that I wish I had a “re-do” or “do-over” or….Big Eraser! For all the times that I was insensitive and hurtful to others, it has really brought me back down to earth. The whole process has humbled me and I find myself judging others far less than I did when I was younger and thought I knew everything. We do grow from our mistakes, as painful as it can be.
April says
There have been so many times that an eraser would have been a life saver… but I suppose that it’s your mistakes, and learning from them, that make you who you are. There are times that I look back on a specific mistake I made and wish so badly that I could erase it all, but I know that I can’t. I just have to move forward and do my best to right any wrongs. Great post!
– April
A Swirl Girl says
Elle,
Thanks so much for sharing your heart! I believe that one of the deepest regrets we can have in life center on either “The one who got away” or “The one we should have let get away.” As the proverbial saying goes, “Hindsight is 20-20.”
How wonderful to be able to come to a place of self-forgiveness and also of healing of our hurt. To do as you did – see the good that came out of the “bad” – in your case, your two beautiful children, not to mention the wisdom you gained from the experience. Thankfully, you didn’t allow it to make you bitter – you came through it and you’re able to see that in the end, it made you better. Experiences such as yours (and ones I’ve had, and I’m sure many of us can think of) are strangely helpful in that we discover levels of strength and resilience we didn’t realize we had. Sure, it didn’t feel good to have to find out, yet at least we know it’s THERE. Not only that, we can look back and know that we didn’t just SURVIVe, we have THRIVED! Woot Woot! 🙂
Elle says
This is certainly true for me. It took me a long time to forgive myself for marrying the wrong person. I had two beautiful children and felt guilty that the marriage didn’t work. As I traveled down the path of single motherhood I found strength, joy, love and self forgiveness. And once I was able to forgive myself, my life became wonderful! I now appreciate my mistake for all the wisdom it afforded me and all the lessons I was able to share with others because if my journey.
Mistakes are opportunities to learn, don’t miss out simply because you are afraid to make another mistake.
Elle