Depending how long you’ve been hearing about or reading self-help books of the “relationship” genre, you may or may not be familiar with the iconic NY Times bestseller, Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus: A Practical Guide for Improving Communication & Getting What You Want in Your Relationships, by John Gray, PhD.
In his book, “Dr. John Gray provides a practical and proven way for men and women to improve their communication by acknowledging the differences between their needs, desires, and behaviors.”
The short version?
The premise of the book is simple. Men and women are different.
We Have A New Feature
Yeah, men and women are different. Throw in the added twist of an interracial relationship and well, things can get very interesting.
Today, we take great pleasure in introducing a new feature here on the blog: He Says, She Says!
Enter millennials Angelique Evette Long and Jonathan Gamel. As we progress with this series, we’re going to pose the same question to this couple.
Our purpose is to glean some insight not only into the male and female perspective on the same question, but more important, from the perspective of a Black woman and a White man involved in an interracial relationship.
Meet Angelique and Jonathan!
She Says: Angelique Evette Long
I was born and raised in a small country town called Belle Mina, Alabama. I’m a mother of 3 amazing children; ages 8, 6, and 3. I’m a full-time college student at Athens State University majoring in Psychology, and where I am an executive officer and co-founder of SGA Online.
My passion is to help people who have a mental illness cope with life.
After I complete undergrad and grad school, I plan on using my Master’s Degree to start my own practice; while also working on my PhD.
I’ve always been a helper; whether it be through giving advice or volunteering. I believe that God placed us on Earth to be a light for others, so with each day my heart is open and willing.
He Says: Jonathan Gamel
Right out of high school I started a job working construction because college just didn’t make sense to me.
After 6 years at that job I decided that I was finally tired of using my body, and I was ready to start using my brain. I came up with the idea for an amazing mobile app that is expected to revolutionize the way event marketing is done.
The name of the app is EventPro. It’s in the early stages at the moment but it is coming along nicely. EventPro is a year in the making and I must say that it hasn’t been easy, but it was absolutely worth the risk.
Now I am here interacting with you guys; thanks to Angel. I really appreciate the opportunity that The Swirl World is affording me.
Most people dream of being able to tell their heartfelt opinions about important lifestyle topics to an audience of captivated listeners or readers, and here we are! I really hope that everyone enjoys reading the articles that will follow.
How They Met
“We met via social media; Snapchat to be exact. It had been a year since my previous relationship and I was still a little bitter, so one day I just decided to make a snap saying, “I’m convinced that no man can handle me!”
Jonathan saw my post and private messaged asking, “Is it possible that you create situations where no man can “handle” you?”
His response was so intriguing; I didn’t know whether to feel impressed or insulted!
I became slightly interested, so I messaged him back and we hit it off quite well. This month would make it one year ago since that initial conversation; we’ve been going strong ever since.
Jonathan and I want to reach out to those who may be struggling to find a partner, and/or to interracial couples that may need advice on the everyday issues that mixed relationships face.
It’s not easy being in an interracial relationship, especially when you’re from a place where dating outside of your race is not approved. Because we live in the South, we get the whispers and the rude stares whenever we go out in public.
It used to get to me at first because Jonathan is the first white guy I’ve ever dated, so I wasn’t used to that. Eventually, I told myself, ‘Stop being bothered by anyone who doesn’t approve of your relationship; they contribute nothing to your love life. What’s important is that I love Jonathan and he loves me. That’s all that will ever matter.’
So now when I notice the negative reactions from people, I just smile at them and keep going.
Our reasons for wanting to reach out to the singles looking to date outside of their race is that we understand that for some people, it takes little or no effort to find the mate they are looking for, but for others it isn’t so easy. We want to address these issues, and give advice based on our own personal experiences.
Next Week: Let The Questions Begin!
Stay tuned for the next edition of He Says, She Says, when Angel and Jonathan respond to the question:
Black women get a LOT of flak from seemingly all sides in relation to their dating practices. What are they doing right when it comes to dating?
Join In The Fray: Got a question for Angel and Jonathan?
Send it c/o ASwirlGirl@TheSwirlWorl.com.
See you next week for the inaugural edition of He Says, She Says!
Copyright ©2016 Michelle Matthews Calloway, The Swirl World™ LLC, ASwirlGirl™, The Swirl World™, The Swirl World Podcast™, The Swirl World Inspiration Daily™, Swirl Nation™, All rights reserved. Photos used with permission.