How Do You Define The Reality Of Love?

If you were asked to describe “The Reality Of Love,” what would be your response?

This week’s couple, Valentai and Justin Cook reflect the reality of love – but not for the reason you might expect.

I’m especially excited about this installment of “Ordinary People – Extraordinary Love” for several reasons.

First, Valentai and Justin Cook are a military family (Justin is a Marine). Valentai is Black and Justin is Irish-German.

Needless to say, we at The Swirl World love and appreciate our men and women in uniform. Not only that, as a former Army brat I know what military life is like and I’m acutely aware of the sacrifices required of every member of the family. Kudos to all who serve their country!

Second, Justin and Valentai are together because her brother (1) loved her, (2) wanted to see her happy and (3) was open-minded enough to realize that love comes in more than one color.

That’s right: Valentai’s brother brought them together.

The Cook’s Sweet Story 

Valentai says:

“We live on Camp Pendleton in California. We’ve been together for 2 1/2 years. We have two children, both boys. Their ages are 7-years old (Albert) and 2-months old (Dylan). 

Valentai Cook 1

We met through my brother who is also in the Marines. 

I knew I was in love with Justin when I saw how wonderful he was with my son. I knew he’d make an amazing husband and father. 

What I like most about him is his kindness and determination to always make the best out of whatever life throws us.” 

Valentai’s Advice

My advice I would give to anyone in or seeking an interracial relationship would be to know what you want 100% and don’t let anyone tell you they you don’t deserve happiness. People will always be judgmental, but as long as you and that special someone are happy, then nothing can break that love. “

The Reality Of Love

When someone – be it family member, friend, neighbor, coworker, whomever – genuinely loves you, he or she will want the best for you.

They won’t begrudge your happiness – and they won’t try to dictate it, either.

Valentai’s brother recognized that Justin, his fellow Marine was a quality man.

So much so, he introduced him to his sister.

There was no haterade flowing or blocking going on – just a loving brother who wanted to see his sister happy.

The reality of love is that it always seeks the good of its object – no matter what.

Does this depiction of love reflect your reality? If not, what are you going to do about it?

NOTE: Valentai informed me that Justin just left for deployment, so let’s be sure to send lots of prayers and love to the Cook family. We look forward to hearing more from this couple and wish them and their sons all the best.

2-month old Dylan Cook

2-month old Dylan Cook


Join in the Fray: How’s your “love” life?

Copyright © 2013 Michelle Matthews Calloway, ASwirlGirl™, The Swirl World™, All rights reserved. Photos used with permission.










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  1. Chongo says

    She has a lovely family. Her brother’s love for her is amazing and a great example of the fact that someone who genuinely loves you, will help you live your best possible life, a good quality life.
    Best wishes for the family during Justin’s deployment.

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