What Can Mixed-Race People Teach Us About Love?

 

Terra Ann and Ben 6So often when many people think of “interracial” couples, they think predominantly in terms of a combination of two races.

They think: Black and White, Asian and White, Latino and Black and any other combination of two you can think of.

An interracial pairing can be so much MORE than simply a combination of two races or ethnicities!

Today, we’re happy we get to highlight Benjamin and Terra Ann – two mixed-race people who, together compose a truly “Mixed Race” couple.

Terra Ann says, “A lot of people say “mixed” when they are only describing two races. And I, being true to myself, am really more than three-dimensional when it comes to having to check only “Caucasian” or “African American” in the boxes on a form. But I’m proud of my multi-racial ethnicity. It’s unique.”

Benjamin’s ethnicity is Scott-Irish, Cherokee Indian and German. Terra Ann’s Dad is African American, and her Mother is a combination of French, German, Black Dutch, Cherokee Indian and Irish.

How’s that for “Mixed??”

Terra Ann continues, “I may not have been around to see or speak with my great-great grandparents to know their history and stories. But it is shown through my blood. And that is great history that no one can take or make up.”

Benjamin and Terra Ann – two “Mixed Ordinary People Who Found Mixed Extraordinary Love!

Terra Ann and Ben

A Blended Family

We both live in Oklahoma. Ben is from Midwest City, Oklahoma and I grew up in Del City, Oklahoma. Both cities are literally 10 minutes apart, which makes it a little bizarre that we had never met until last October.

As of November 19th our relationship marks a year, even though at times it can seem longer. (I say that with a sweet smile.)

We both had children before we met. I have two full of energy and very sharp children; a daughter, Samera who is 6 and a son, Jre’Lyn who is 5 (his name is pronounced (Dre Lin).

Ben and Jre'Lyn at the couple's first family dinner at a restaurant

Ben and Jre’Lyn at the couple’s first family dinner at a restaurant

Ben has a very beautiful daughter that is the same age as my son. Both of my children adore Ben and he as well is in love with my children, and I love his daughter.

 Ben and Samera at a friend's pool party

Ben and Samera at a friend’s pool party

How They Met

Ben and I met at a local dance bar in Midwest City. A mutual friend we had at the time asked me to go and stand in on her behalf at a bachelor/ bachelorette party she was hosting for a couple she knew. She was running late, so she called and asked me to play hostess until she got there. I obviously agreed. I’m very glad I did!

When I first saw Ben, yes, I could see he was a very attractive man; very fit. He was also a very boisterous individual. At first, that is where it stopped. I didn’t think twice about him and me ever becoming a couple. Plus I had no idea he was interested in me. A couple of weeks later he told me he liked me and was very interested in me. He was also very honest concerning where he wanted the relationship to go. I liked him, too – so we soon made it official and became a couple.

Ben and Terra Ann at their first date as a couple

Ben and Terra Ann at their first date as a couple

Defining Moments

My defining moment I knew I was in love with Ben was after we’d been together for five months. As we dated, I realized we are completely different in almost every way – which to me was a good thing, because I may not have been able to stay with him if he was too much like me in personality.

Despite our many differences our morals, goals, family values and beliefs are the same. We were hit with obstacles almost every step of the way, but really it has only brought us closer together.

Ben says the defining moment he knew he was in love with me came when he knew I was here for him and would not give up on him. Or judge him. I’m one of his biggest fans.

"Ben says the defining moment he knew he was in love with me came when he knew I was here for him and would not give up on him. Or judge him. I'm one of his biggest fans."

“Ben says the defining moment he knew he was in love with me came when he knew I was here for him and would not give up on him. Or judge him. I’m one of his biggest fans.”

What We Like About Each Other

What I absolutely like about Ben is his blunt honesty. Maybe it’s due from his experience from being in the military.  If you ever want to have the most accurate and honest opinion of something, Ben would be your guy. He is so diverse in conversation that his being honest makes it so refreshing to me. Our conversations are entertaining nonetheless. Of course there are other likable characteristics about him; that’s just the number one thing for me.

Ben says what he likes most about me is I’m altruistic for anyone and anything.

Through The Good Times – And The Bad 

Ben and I have been through a great deal of hardship, trials and tribulations, since being together. There have been people that have tried to come between us. Tear us apart. And have been jealous of our relationship.

Even when odds were against us we have stuck it out. Even though it was getting repetitive and tiresome we always have seen the “great’ in the two of us. Believed in each other. And we always have great communication. We make sure we are both on the same page.

It helps when you have family that sees you’re happy, and supports your love as well. We both had different backgrounds growing up. And for some reason what the two of us share is an exponential love. No matter what comes our way. We both value the love.

"Ben and I at a favorite bar we used to go too. It's special because it was our first photo together."

“Ben and I at a favorite bar we used to go too. It’s special because it was our first photo together.”

What A Mixed Race Couple Can Teach Us About Love

So, what can a mixed race couple teach us about love?

In Terra Ann’s words, “Love will fight. Love holds on, despite your background and history.”

A mixed-race couple can teach us that regardless of the simplicity or complexity of the mix, love is always a beautiful thing.

They teach us that with the proliferation of Swirling, soon, many couples will look and be composed of multiple ethnicities - just like Ben and Terra Ann.

They teach us that you can’t advocate Swirling and then turn around and make disparaging remarks about the mixed offspring that is produced.

Mixed Race people teach us if you love to Swirl, you have to love the mix, too.

Benjamin and Terra Ann Archer . . . Ordinary People . . . . Extraordinary Love.

Swirl on.

 

Join in the Fray: What’s your family history?

All rights reserved. All work is the copyright of the respective owner, otherwise copyright © 2013 Michelle Matthews Calloway, ASwirlGirl™, The Swirl World™, Dallas, TX, USA. Photos used with permission.

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About Michelle Calloway

I'm a native Louisianan currently living in Dallas, TX. I have a B.S. degree in marketing, an MBA and a PhD in higher education administration. I love writing and research, and also thoroughly enjoy reading and working out.

I am passionate about cultural/ethnic diversity and interracial relationships; so much so that my dissertation focused on these concepts. This is my outlet for blogging about interracial relationships and social issues. In The Swirl World, we celebrate "Ordinary People . . . Extraordinary Love!"

You can also find me on Twitter or Instagram @ASwirlGirl.

Love vintage photos and history with your pop culture? Them come and join me on Facebook at The Swirl World (http://www.facebook.com/TheSwirlWorld).

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